DON'T TELL PETA WE SAID THIS, BUT...
Maybe they should send this woman to Oakdale.
(Thanks to many people)
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May 27, 2004
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Maybe she should go on tour with Ozzie...
Posted by: Blogchik | May 27, 2004 at 04:48 AM
Why the hell would you put a snake in your mouth...and you people know what kind of snake I mean.
Posted by: MeL | May 27, 2004 at 04:51 AM
At least the guy who walked around with a rat in his mouth didn't BITE.
Posted by: MOTW | May 27, 2004 at 04:52 AM
Listerine! The cure for Snake Head Breath!
*focus on bedroom scene, early morning. couple in bed begins to stretch and wake up*
Wife: *ya-a-w-n!*
Husband: Oh, gross!
Wife: Um, is something 'wrong', Dear?
Husband: Well, YEAH! Your breath ... it ..
Wife: Something is wrong with my breath?
Husband: It smells .. like .. like you bit off a snake's head or something ..
*wife turns toward camera, has a worried look*
Wife (to herself): Oh, no! He's found out. Better reach for LISTERINE quick!
Posted by: MOTW | May 27, 2004 at 05:07 AM
ANYONE biting a head off of ANY snake shouldn't be charged with animal cruelty. They should be given a place at the local circus to work!
Cruelty
1 : disposed to inflict pain or suffering
2 : causing or conducive to injury, grief, or pain
BOTH of these require the subject to be alive to experience the act. THE SNAKE'S DEAD. Missing heads has a tendency to make painful feelings go away.
Posted by: Kibby F5 | May 27, 2004 at 05:24 AM
Kibby, I agree. I'm not sure what the correct charge should be, but it wasn't cruelty if she only gave it one good, swift, clean strike of the executioner's incisors.
Maybe "Deprival of Animal Husbandry"?
Posted by: jamester | May 27, 2004 at 05:30 AM
She has a bad case of Herpetolingual Oral Tourettes Syndrome (HOTS) and therefore will be found innocent of any spurous charges lodged against her.
Posted by: philintexas | May 27, 2004 at 05:48 AM
Note to self:
Do not go to mexico with this woman. Also refrain from drinking tequila with this woman.
Posted by: cheese_ball839 | May 27, 2004 at 05:50 AM
She doesnt have 2 worry about charges. Someone who bites a snakes head off is very obviously gone off the deep end.
Posted by: Andygirl | May 27, 2004 at 06:11 AM
Mmmmmm.....snake.........
Posted by: steve | May 27, 2004 at 06:22 AM
I suppose, if the allegation's true, the snake had a "fleeting moment of realization' on how the mice must have felt.
Nature has a wonderful sense of irony, doesn't it?
Posted by: Kibby F5 | May 27, 2004 at 06:27 AM
Folks, this is the guy they need in Oakdale.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 27, 2004 at 06:44 AM
Snkae! The Other-Other White Meat!
Posted by: crash | May 27, 2004 at 06:44 AM
haha oops snake*
Posted by: crash | May 27, 2004 at 06:45 AM
Snake! The Other-Other White Meat!
Posted by: crash | May 27, 2004 at 06:46 AM
actually crash, its the other other other white meat, if uve seen extreme days
Posted by: Andygirl | May 27, 2004 at 07:01 AM
which if u havent u should go rent it right now
Posted by: Andygirl | May 27, 2004 at 07:01 AM
I bet the snake started it.
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | May 27, 2004 at 07:44 AM
Jeff, that was priceless.
Key Quote:
"One furry kill cleared the full width of his building and two stoops. It whizzed by spectators, who lunged out of the way."
And I loved the action photos!
Posted by: mudstuffin | May 27, 2004 at 08:04 AM
Oh, and the snake-biting lady. Can you believe she announced it to the people around her, AND THEN DID IT??
This is like Ruth's called shot home run only disturbed and disgusting.
Posted by: mudstuffin | May 27, 2004 at 08:07 AM
So now in the animal world they are watching on TV "When hunmans bite."
Posted by: Jayson | May 27, 2004 at 08:52 AM
What IS this ANANOVA, anyway? Who are these reporters? Why can't they spell? Or write?
Posted by: tivomarcia | May 27, 2004 at 09:00 AM
Mudstuffin, there was a followup today where the city said it was going to put down poison and Mr. Rat-Whacker said he'd reserve judgment: if they killed the rats, fine, otherwise he'd be back out there with his bats, whacking away.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 27, 2004 at 09:20 AM
Sorry, but I call dibs on Mr. Rat-Whacker. WBAGNFARB
Posted by: mudstuffin | May 27, 2004 at 09:31 AM
I think that the snake hunter in Dallas has his next assignment. IF he can ever find that snake he was looking for a few weeks ago. How about an update on him? What was his name? We all wrote theme songs for him. Did he get the snake? Has he left for Oakdale yet?
The lady who owned the snake must have been a terrible hostess. You would think that she would offer her guests something to eat before they got this hungry! How is that for turning the blame around?! And why in the world was the boyfriend playing peeping tom? This whole story is creepy; is it true? Isn't Annanova one of those "Star-type" publications?
Posted by: Jessica | May 27, 2004 at 11:33 AM
"While she didn't see the incident, her boyfriend who was watching from a nearby house, told police he saw Christensen bite the snake."
What kind of houses do these people live in, anyway? Are these the famed glass house people?
Posted by: Angie | May 27, 2004 at 02:46 PM
Andygirl:
I love that movie. Saw it in the theatre.
RUFIO!!!!
haha. I heard they actually set the set ceiling on fire, accidentally.
Posted by: crash | May 27, 2004 at 05:48 PM
I love that Ananova had this story in their "bad taste" section, rather than "animal tales."
"What IS this ANANOVA, anyway? Who are these reporters? Why can't they spell? Or write?" Well, tivomarcia, Ananova is something you should checkout for yourself. It's a website that always has a large section of "quirkies" where so many of get the stories we send in to Dave.
(www.ananova.com)
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 28, 2004 at 06:25 AM