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May 27, 2004

DON'T TELL PETA WE SAID THIS, BUT...

Maybe they should send this woman to Oakdale.

(Thanks to many people)

Comments

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Maybe she should go on tour with Ozzie...

Why the hell would you put a snake in your mouth...and you people know what kind of snake I mean.

At least the guy who walked around with a rat in his mouth didn't BITE.

Listerine! The cure for Snake Head Breath!
*focus on bedroom scene, early morning. couple in bed begins to stretch and wake up*

Wife: *ya-a-w-n!*
Husband: Oh, gross!
Wife: Um, is something 'wrong', Dear?
Husband: Well, YEAH! Your breath ... it ..
Wife: Something is wrong with my breath?
Husband: It smells .. like .. like you bit off a snake's head or something ..
*wife turns toward camera, has a worried look*
Wife (to herself): Oh, no! He's found out. Better reach for LISTERINE quick!

ANYONE biting a head off of ANY snake shouldn't be charged with animal cruelty. They should be given a place at the local circus to work!

Cruelty
1 : disposed to inflict pain or suffering
2 : causing or conducive to injury, grief, or pain

BOTH of these require the subject to be alive to experience the act. THE SNAKE'S DEAD. Missing heads has a tendency to make painful feelings go away.

Kibby, I agree. I'm not sure what the correct charge should be, but it wasn't cruelty if she only gave it one good, swift, clean strike of the executioner's incisors.

Maybe "Deprival of Animal Husbandry"?

She has a bad case of Herpetolingual Oral Tourettes Syndrome (HOTS) and therefore will be found innocent of any spurous charges lodged against her.

Note to self:

Do not go to mexico with this woman. Also refrain from drinking tequila with this woman.

She doesnt have 2 worry about charges. Someone who bites a snakes head off is very obviously gone off the deep end.

Mmmmmm.....snake.........

I suppose, if the allegation's true, the snake had a "fleeting moment of realization' on how the mice must have felt.

Nature has a wonderful sense of irony, doesn't it?

Folks, this is the guy they need in Oakdale.

Snkae! The Other-Other White Meat!

haha oops snake*

Snake! The Other-Other White Meat!

actually crash, its the other other other white meat, if uve seen extreme days

which if u havent u should go rent it right now

I bet the snake started it.

Jeff, that was priceless.

Key Quote:

"One furry kill cleared the full width of his building and two stoops. It whizzed by spectators, who lunged out of the way."

And I loved the action photos!

Oh, and the snake-biting lady. Can you believe she announced it to the people around her, AND THEN DID IT??

This is like Ruth's called shot home run only disturbed and disgusting.

So now in the animal world they are watching on TV "When hunmans bite."

What IS this ANANOVA, anyway? Who are these reporters? Why can't they spell? Or write?

Mudstuffin, there was a followup today where the city said it was going to put down poison and Mr. Rat-Whacker said he'd reserve judgment: if they killed the rats, fine, otherwise he'd be back out there with his bats, whacking away.

Sorry, but I call dibs on Mr. Rat-Whacker. WBAGNFARB

I think that the snake hunter in Dallas has his next assignment. IF he can ever find that snake he was looking for a few weeks ago. How about an update on him? What was his name? We all wrote theme songs for him. Did he get the snake? Has he left for Oakdale yet?

The lady who owned the snake must have been a terrible hostess. You would think that she would offer her guests something to eat before they got this hungry! How is that for turning the blame around?! And why in the world was the boyfriend playing peeping tom? This whole story is creepy; is it true? Isn't Annanova one of those "Star-type" publications?

"While she didn't see the incident, her boyfriend who was watching from a nearby house, told police he saw Christensen bite the snake."

What kind of houses do these people live in, anyway? Are these the famed glass house people?

Andygirl:
I love that movie. Saw it in the theatre.
RUFIO!!!!
haha. I heard they actually set the set ceiling on fire, accidentally.

I love that Ananova had this story in their "bad taste" section, rather than "animal tales."

"What IS this ANANOVA, anyway? Who are these reporters? Why can't they spell? Or write?" Well, tivomarcia, Ananova is something you should checkout for yourself. It's a website that always has a large section of "quirkies" where so many of get the stories we send in to Dave.
(www.ananova.com)

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