BRAD PITT, EAT YOUR HEART OUT

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Man, am I glad I didn't click on that at work. That could get me fired.
Posted by: Lily | May 12, 2004 at 12:42 PM
Be nice, Lily.
Posted by: John | May 12, 2004 at 12:43 PM
Oh and first!
Posted by: Lily | May 12, 2004 at 12:43 PM
I was nice. I can't be oggling pictures of Male Models and Movie Stars while I'm working. I would never get anything done.
Posted by: Lily | May 12, 2004 at 12:45 PM
Dave, that's sure a BIG picture.
Posted by: John | May 12, 2004 at 12:45 PM
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
They turned Dave into a caterpiller....!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Posted by: Graz | May 12, 2004 at 12:46 PM
Is it just me, or does that tag say "High Energy Shorts?"
And wouldn't that be a great name for a rock and roll band?
Posted by: The King | May 12, 2004 at 12:46 PM
nice nose hairs. (made 'ya look)
Posted by: elmerf | May 12, 2004 at 12:47 PM
That's "High Energy SPORTS."
Posted by: John | May 12, 2004 at 12:48 PM
HA. That has made my day.
Posted by: katherine | May 12, 2004 at 12:48 PM
you look like a big penis.
Posted by: katherine | May 12, 2004 at 12:49 PM
Now, if that's not top-notch Presidential material, I don't know what is.
Posted by: D'Artagnan | May 12, 2004 at 12:52 PM
I'm glad some people are able to spend their day being productive and all ... AND wear '80s shades at the same time ...
Posted by: Funniegrrl | May 12, 2004 at 12:53 PM
Now I am even happier that I have tickets to see Dave in person on June 2.
Dave I will be front row balcony, seat 20A.(Great seat BTW, I had the same one for Phantom of the Opera. You can see much better there than from the floor.)Look for a tall, very attractive Brunette with long hair. If you look up there I'll wave.
Posted by: Lily | May 12, 2004 at 12:54 PM
i made him smaller. perhaps the quality has suffered (i don't have great image software here) but at least we can see it without scrolling sideways. yes?
Posted by: judi | May 12, 2004 at 12:57 PM
You look like you're ready to receive 25 roman candles hurled at your chest.
But I really like the Hawaiin shirt!!
Posted by: Lmd33 | May 12, 2004 at 01:00 PM
Are you filming this movie in Florida?
Posted by: Lmd33 | May 12, 2004 at 01:01 PM
Judi, you made Dave smaller? I sure hope you asked permission before doing that. Can you imagine if for some reason the quality has suffered? I'd hate to see what the Great Humorous One has to say about that.
Posted by: D'Artagnan | May 12, 2004 at 01:04 PM
I'm wondering if that gray thing he's wearing says "Passenger" or "Messenger" as in "don't shoot the..."?
Thanks for fixing the MOAT judi! :-) As well as cutting Dave down to size! ;-)
Posted by: eadn | May 12, 2004 at 01:05 PM
>>you look like a big penis.
Katherine. Spelled backwards it's 'sinep' which in arkansas may mean 'cameltoe'.
Posted by: snooty | May 12, 2004 at 01:08 PM
ya done just fine, judi.
Posted by: sookeyjane | May 12, 2004 at 01:09 PM
Shouldn't that read "S.S. Swinger"?
Oh behave.
This movie is gonna rule!!!
Yay, Lily got first. Now get my freakin arm out from under your desk chair!
Posted by: Garret | May 12, 2004 at 01:11 PM
I'm all for anyone who can wear hawaiin prints like Dave does.
Posted by: MeL | May 12, 2004 at 01:11 PM
So what's with the Chinese peppers?
You look great, Dave, but don't let those Hollywood cheese scumsuckers corrupt your integrity. Remember, you can only spend what you don't make.
Posted by: Bob C | May 12, 2004 at 01:12 PM
*hands Garret his arm back*
Sorry. I forgot I had it. You need a stapler for that? I have one I'm not using right now.
It's cool how you and Dave have matching Hawaiian shirts though.
Posted by: Lily | May 12, 2004 at 01:16 PM
This looks suspiciously like evil-doers plan to launch Dave from something, like a catapult. Why else the crash helmet? BE CAREFUL OUT THERE, DAVE!
Posted by: Guin | May 12, 2004 at 01:23 PM
Be still, my beating heart!!!!!
:)
Posted by: Andrea | May 12, 2004 at 01:26 PM
it takes a REAL man to wear that outfit and post a pic of it.
or is that a real guy?
Posted by: sookeyjane | May 12, 2004 at 01:43 PM
Actually, it looks like an alien lobster-thingie named "Ssenger" has its arms around Dave's neck and is, uh, doing something to him. If you know what I mean.
I quite admire Dave for being so stoic in the midst of such an immense alien violation.
D
Posted by: Murph | May 12, 2004 at 01:44 PM
Dave, are you sure you're not making THIS up?
Posted by: jamester | May 12, 2004 at 02:07 PM
Dave, A REAL man would pose wearing nothing but his snorkel.
Posted by: agent 66 | May 12, 2004 at 02:15 PM
It looks like Dave is being swallowed by a giant insect of some kind who has already gotten past his legs. But Dave looks like he's feeling no pain, and the dark glasses confirm that there was probably Tequila and/or a case of beer involved. Anyway, he definitely looks like he's ready to ride the wok down the escalator or, as Mmd33 pointed out, have a pal (me first!) shoot 25 roman candles at his chest.
Can't wait for this movie!
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 12, 2004 at 02:20 PM
Lmd33; sorry
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 12, 2004 at 02:22 PM
Oh and in the interest of being clear, which one of my posts here was not, besides this one.
The tall attractive brunette is my sister-in-law. I'll be sitting next to her.
I'm 5'2'. Not at all tall. I do have long hair though. Not that you will notice. She is really pretty.
Posted by: Lily | May 12, 2004 at 02:47 PM
This is disturbing.
Posted by: cw | May 12, 2004 at 02:47 PM
If I'm not mistaken, this looks like a hang-gliding harness (like being dragged behing a boat). Is this the before or after?
Posted by: BMX3 | May 12, 2004 at 02:56 PM
You'll have to go to the movie to find out.
Posted by: Dave Barry | May 12, 2004 at 03:02 PM
What, no teasers?
Posted by: Graz | May 12, 2004 at 03:09 PM
Have no fear, Assenger Man is here!
Posted by: Dan Gross | May 12, 2004 at 03:37 PM
Oh my God! Dave remarked on my post? *Bowing* I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy!
///I'm can die happy now. I made the Blog trifecta this week: I got a "first", a post citation (under my "real name", see 'AN EXTRA-SPECIAL DAY FOR MOM') and a response from the Blogmeister himself! Thank you everyone, it's been nice, goodbye!!
Posted by: BMX3 | May 12, 2004 at 03:57 PM
SWOON!!
Posted by: punky brewster | May 12, 2004 at 03:58 PM
Director: "Mr. Barry, all we need you to do is jump in the water and climb back out."
Dave: "Do you have any idea how deep that water is? I'm not getting in without a full body life jacket!"
Director: "All right, all right. A full body life jacket. Can we shoot the scene now?"
Dave: "And a helmet. I need a helmet. I might hit my head on the dock and get a nasty bump."
Director: "Okay. A full body life jacket and a helmet. Can we shoot the scene now?"
Dave: "And some sunglasses. It's very bright out here. I could burn my retina, you know?"
Director: "Okay! A full body life jacket, a helmet, and sunglasses. Now can we shoot the ... what? We lost the light? Okay everyone, that's a wrap. We'll pick this up again tomorrow."
Posted by: Garret | May 12, 2004 at 04:39 PM
Judi's movie will be entitled; "Honey, I Shrunk the Blogmeister."
Posted by: Jessica | May 12, 2004 at 04:43 PM
Dave models the prototype for airline corpse containment devices.
Posted by: jk | May 12, 2004 at 04:48 PM
Funny ish, yo.
Posted by: Captain_Laredo | May 12, 2004 at 06:58 PM
I have reason to believe that Jimmy Kimmel steals his material from Dave's blog because well...he just talked about the Mexican Air Force and UFO's and most of what he said seemed eerily a lot like several of the comments left...hmmm
Posted by: MeL | May 12, 2004 at 07:11 PM
This is what you look like just before you are discovered by the Queer Eye For The Straight Guy team.
Posted by: emkeane | May 12, 2004 at 08:08 PM
- Boxers or briefs?
Posted by: bobb | May 12, 2004 at 08:49 PM
have been lurking for a while, but after seeing this i felt like i just had to say something... but my mind went blank. utterly. but i did have a question: do Weebles wobble and not fall down? it seems you should know the answer.
Posted by: waxwing | May 13, 2004 at 04:38 AM
Weebles do wobble and don't fall down. I have seen this phenomenon with my own eyes!!! The question is, why? If we can harness this Weeble technology, we can make the world a bettter place! For instance we can make our buildings earthquake proof. Buildings wobble but they don't fall down thanke to the New Weeble Technology! The possibilities are endless.
Posted by: BMX3 | May 13, 2004 at 05:30 AM
Only a Real Guy could stand in a fully insulated/inflated SSENGER suit without a hint of perspiration. Whattahunk!
Posted by: MOTW | May 13, 2004 at 05:46 AM
BIG Dave Barry fan, here. So don't get me wrong.
But is anyone else getting the teensy-weensiest bit tired of seeing this picture.
(Psst. Hey Judi! Can you keep making it smaller and smaller?)
Posted by: Garret | May 13, 2004 at 06:00 AM
I'm speechless.
Posted by: crash | May 13, 2004 at 06:14 AM
Maybe you should hold a contest; about the greatest guy, or something like that.
The winner could get that giant bib you're wearing, Dave.
Posted by: crash | May 13, 2004 at 06:18 AM
i'm not tired of seeing it. indeed, i can't look away. i am trying to enlarge it for transfer to my pillowcase. and maybe print it smaller to affix to the pack of Trojans nearby. so many, many possibilities!
Posted by: waxwing | May 13, 2004 at 06:33 AM
In keeping with the don't shoot the messenger idea, I've decided that it is a full body kevlar vest and that Dave is indeed, doing his own stunts.
Posted by: MeL | May 13, 2004 at 06:40 AM
I liked the thought that it was a giant lead bullet-proof bib better.
All the more protection from the lobster mutants.
Posted by: crash | May 13, 2004 at 06:46 AM
Is Henry (Ki)ssenger involved in this movie? Is he really a guy in any accepted guy sense?
Posted by: Cheesewiz | May 13, 2004 at 07:06 AM
it could have said "messenger", but Dave wasn't quite tall enough.
Posted by: crash | May 13, 2004 at 07:10 AM
or more appropriately: pASSenger
Posted by: crash | May 13, 2004 at 07:14 AM
maybe they put those on the bodies they put into the little cupboard by the airplane exit
Posted by: crash | May 13, 2004 at 07:15 AM
A note from The Department of Pontification.
Hey Dave, thanks for the pictures of your early summer vacation. Over
here in Pontificating, we were wondering the following. Given that:
1) Dave is in the humor business.
2) Dave's garb includes a helmet.
Therefore, are we to suppose:
a) Humor is a full contact sport.
ii) Dave's lobster dress causes seizures.
3) Some weird form of alien abduction. Which,
given the look of his smirk, may lead us to include anal probing in his abduction.
IV) He's the new spokesmodel for Red Lobster.
Their new campaign -- "All you can eat middle aged white dude".
Inquiring minds want to know.
Chaz Stevens
Deerfield Beach, Florida
Posted by: Chaz Stevens | May 13, 2004 at 08:25 AM
I am not. Now just go on about your commenting.
Posted by: Jimmy Kimmel | May 13, 2004 at 08:42 AM
I think you have all missed the mark on the printing. I believe that what we are seeing is a mirror image of the actual title "REGNESS", as in "Good morning, your REGNESS, your limo is waiting". Guess we'll have to see the movie to know what it means.
Posted by: Flash | May 13, 2004 at 09:35 AM
I looked again and it hit me. It stands for Real Guy
Ness. Dave is certainly the epitome!
Posted by: Flash | May 13, 2004 at 09:38 AM
I'm sticking with PASSENGER.
Maybe they threw him overboard or something.
Maybe out of a small aircraft, that would explain the helmet to a small degree.
Posted by: crash | May 13, 2004 at 10:05 AM
Hey Dave, is this photo from the scene with Sidekick, and is he in there with you somewhere??
Posted by: Flash | May 13, 2004 at 11:45 AM
I like it. Thanks for sharing your crowning glory with us Dave.
Posted by: Ian | May 13, 2004 at 11:58 AM
You have the part of Super Dave?!? That's a big thumbs up!
Posted by: Roger | May 13, 2004 at 12:30 PM
Now why did we not get to see the after photo of this before and after sequence?
Posted by: Jim M | May 13, 2004 at 12:35 PM
Hey, they got Ritalin.
Posted by: Chaz Stevens | May 14, 2004 at 04:38 AM
Did I miss something? Why is there a list of drugs in this thread? Is DB supposed to take one or all of these to cure him of symptoms evidenced in the picture or something?
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | May 14, 2004 at 05:45 AM
Oh, I get it. (duh!)
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | May 14, 2004 at 05:49 AM
Let's all get togther and pommel Buy Drugs online's zorts.
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | May 14, 2004 at 05:52 AM
MKJ: Pommel Zorts wbagnfarb (from another planet). Buy Drugs Online could be their first album.
Posted by: kj | May 15, 2004 at 11:05 AM
Wow, I WAS looking for a sugar daddy, but after vieweing that picture I think I'll look no further.
Posted by: Stepho | May 16, 2004 at 07:17 AM