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April 22, 2004

BUT IT'S LOW IN CARBS!

We don't think this is funny. We're only linking to it so people will stop sending us the link.

(Thanks to many twisted individuals)

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WHY didn't I think of this 2 years ago?? It would have been So much simpler than getting a divorce!!
Oh wait- I don't cook. So maybe this wouldn't have worked for me either.

Not everything is about funny, Dave. Lots of sick and twisted material on your blog.

Hence the audience.

You're right. Not funny.

Blarf.

I suppose he ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chi-an-ti?

"..often contain pork or chicken"...
Often, but not always, I guess. Welcome to the Pissed Off Gourmet's Cafe.

Cannabalistic Tamales wbagnfarb

Tastes more like long pork -- really!

Apparently this is not original. This is rumored to have happened at a local taco restaurant in Jackson, MI. This is unconfirmed, but I try not to think about it as much as possible.

I also avoid local Mexican fast food restaurants.

Eww, blech. Puh.

What do you think the English sometimes make Shepherds Pie with?

I'd just like to say that cannibalism is rare in the Royal Navy. By that, I mean there is a certain amount of it.

What did the cannibal say when he was eating the mexican?

I went to the grocery store today and above some Romain Lettuce there was a sign that said:

LOW CARB LETTUCE!

It's low in carbohydrates!

I just shook my head and sighed. How is it that I'm this normal after having worked there two years?

Is it just me, or has the whole "Low Carb" thing gotten just a little out of hand?

I mean...lettuce?

this distinctively reminds me of a picture I got in an email several months ago...it was a Chinese fortune cookie, and the fortune read: "That wasn't chicken."
I should go into the fortune cookie-making industry. Think of the fun you could have!!!

"We don't know when, we don't know how, but someday, you're going to die."

I could call it MISfortune cookies.
Ha!

So, Dave, I'm a twisted individual? I guess so.
"Mexicans - the other other white meat." (Well, maybe not.)

Low carb lettuce? Is that for real? Wow, some poeple will (literally) buy anything!

So will "people."

When it comes out in five years that the best thing to lose weight is a HIGH-carb diet, I'm going to laugh like a hyena.

DISC: I live in Jackson, and I'm at work right now. I just mentioned this article to the four people in the room with me, and two of them simultaneously remarked, "Oh yeah, like the taco guy!"

Let's just say that workplace banter has been especially morbid, disturbing, and downright entertaining for the last few minutes.

By the way, here's a tip: Probably the safest place to go for Mexican food in Jackson these days is the freezer section of Meijer's.

I doubt tamales are low in carbs. They have a rather thick corn dough outer layer (or whatever).
Being a vegetarian who doesn't eat enough green vegetables, I pretty much live on carbs. And I can assure you, a high-carb diet is not the best way to lose weight.
(important personage- Very nice Python reference)

Aren't we all missing something obvious here? I mean, tamales are basically Mexican meat pies.

*clears throat*

"Attend the tale of Sweeney Todd. . ."

This is a job for the creepy PLUMP, JUICY, TENDER kid

barbiguinness - I have a few vegetarian friends. Um, they tend to fart a lot. So, you could say that vegetarianism is a great way to lose weight, you can shed unwanted spouses, pets, aquaintences just by squeezing off a few.

Almost all of the vegetarians I know smoke. They are all very quick to lecture me about the health concerns of eating meat. Go figure.

Why don't cannibals eat clowns?

(wait for it)


They taste funny.

Almost all of the vegetarians I know smoke

I'll bet this man is a vegetarian then

MKJ: Thats for that GREAT article. I LOVED it. Who says Canadians don't have a sense of humor? Did you notice how many times they characterized the guy as "dumb ass" "witless" "moron" "idiot" etc. And they say objective reporting is dead!

From human tamales to flaming vegetarians . . .

blog careens out of control . . .

I never lecture anyone about the dangers of meat. But a lot of people are quick to bitch at me for telling them how to live their lives. And I don't smoke. But you know, "I don't smoke" and "You shouldn't smoke" are not the same thing, so I'm not lecturing anybody, okay?
Some people ask me why I am a vegetarian, and then get mad at me if they don't like the answer. I usually don't answer anymore.

Sorry barb, but you didn't address the farting thing.

Mudstuffin:
I haven't noticed an increase in my farting since going veg. You'd have to ask my friends. But I know a lot of people who eat *a lot* of meat, and they certaihnly are not gasless by any stretch of the imagination.
Alex- Do you listen to any Tool?

--Barbi (w/ an "i")

Speaking of the "Disturbing Auctions" site, I know at least two people who own the chicken hat. (#96) Really.

When we lived in Mexico City, we called tamales "surprise bags." You just never knew...

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