PRODUCTIVITY ENHANCER
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz is right.
(Thanks to Bill Crider)
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March 23, 2004
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...'Just like swatting mosquitoes~
Posted by: Eykis | March 23, 2004 at 09:02 AM
If ya let them fly around a bit, they get really big and splatter alot better. Just though ya'll should know....
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 09:05 AM
Man, I should hire a proof reader to check for typos and mis-spelling before I post. Meh....it's MeL's fault anyhoo...
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 09:09 AM
i let em boing around a bit...they just kept getting bigger and bigger, and then they splatted quite nicely. and i swear until i finished typing that, it seemed like a relatively innocent comment.
Posted by: judi | March 23, 2004 at 09:10 AM
Yeah..sure judi...innocent...yeah..thats a good one...
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 09:12 AM
my POINT was that if you let them keep going, they just keep getting bigger. it didn't seem they would stop... and i got bored and killed them. anybody let them go until something different happened?
Posted by: judi | March 23, 2004 at 09:12 AM
has ANYTHING judi has ever typed been "innocent"??? I think not....
Posted by: The Bob | March 23, 2004 at 09:13 AM
well, i'm on the lookout for semi-naked men, but so far all i've got are dodgy sites that i don't think i should link to. and one teensy-weensy-kilt costume. it's hard to find semi-naked men on respectable websites.
Posted by: judi | March 23, 2004 at 09:15 AM
What stops growing after a while, MeL?
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 09:20 AM
mmm, kilts...I think Judi is intentionally teasing us with that one
Posted by: surfbunny | March 23, 2004 at 09:23 AM
I'm going to work. I gotta get a job where I can sit at the computer and comment here......oh , wait...I do.....forget I said that.
Carry on with the jocularity.
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 09:24 AM
Oh boy, I got five of 'em flying all bunched up together, they're REAL big, like twice the size of the swatter. Don't know how much longer I can wait before I squish them, should be able to get all five at one time!
Posted by: Barry | March 23, 2004 at 09:27 AM
MeL - thanks for the much-needed kilt hit
(drools and grins)
Posted by: surfbunny | March 23, 2004 at 09:27 AM
Dave, when you're President, I hope you'll address the fact that many web-based productivity enhancers are not very laptop-friendly.
Posted by: Aaron | March 23, 2004 at 09:29 AM
Ahhh, the sweet, sweet, virtual feel of fly swatting and with 100% less residual gut!
Thank you technology, thank you.
Posted by: c00kie | March 23, 2004 at 09:57 AM
Can we get the swatter for the nun game?
Posted by: Bob | March 23, 2004 at 10:02 AM
No kidding! That would be great, Bob. Those nuns were falling so fast it was impossible to win. I lived like ten seconds each round. The priest with a pistol game was even harder though. I could not even phase that boy that ripped my head off! Is there a way to kill him?
Posted by: Jessica | March 23, 2004 at 10:12 AM
The bugs get bigger AND slower if you let them go. My kids will like this productivity enhancer. There doesn't seem to be a way to lose at this one.
Posted by: Jessica | March 23, 2004 at 10:16 AM
Just wondering - if anyone actually follows through with the disclaimer thing - won't that kind of create a vacuum here where this blog used to exist? I mean, if they remove everything "unlawful, threatening, abusive, libelous, defamatory, obscene, vulgar, pornographic, profane, indecent or otherwise objectionable," isn't that pretty much it?
I'll shut up and go back to corrupting young peop...I mean teaching now.
Posted by: elfbrains | March 23, 2004 at 10:18 AM
Hey hey hey---no more kilts comments. People are trying to eat here!
Posted by: twopuppies | March 23, 2004 at 10:22 AM
Ok, I'm at work and back in cyberspace....please continue with the topic discussions......
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 10:28 AM
elfbrains, I think there's an exception for pun, inuendo, and interprative reading.
MeL, I tried but that thing don't shoot straight!
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 10:38 AM
If you let them get really big and slow, you can see their little eyeballs when you squash them! Yum!
Posted by: Cyberchic | March 23, 2004 at 10:48 AM
Wonder if they had the right hump.....er...cup size for the camel.
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 10:56 AM
After staying home from school and playing this game for 24 hours straight, I realize that there is no way to beat it. Are there even that many insects in the world? :(
Posted by: Buddha | March 23, 2004 at 11:01 AM
Priest hints:
Click on options. Select infinite lives and all weapons from the start.
Push 3 to select the Uzi and blow those mothers away! (Actually, I still get killed pretty quickly. But at least now I get killed in a different fashion -- like having my arm ripped off and shoved in my chest.)
Posted by: Garret | March 23, 2004 at 11:01 AM
Heh, it's true. I'm back (for now at least). I've been busy with various projects such as school, Macbeth, and the band. I probably won't find as much time as I did when commenting first became available (much to everyone's delight, I'm sure).
Posted by: Buddha | March 23, 2004 at 11:07 AM
Also, it should be noted that file-sharing on kazaa now sucks--half the songs cut out after the first thirty seconds because they're just "samples" or whatever. If anyone owns GnR's Appetite for Destruction and is willing to send me "Sweet Child o' Mine" over AOL Instant Messenger, it'd be much appreciated. I don't really expect anyone to go out of their way, though.
Posted by: Buddha | March 23, 2004 at 11:10 AM
School isn't all that time-consuming. What's taken up the most time is my small part in Macbeth and the band. Well...it's like, a band in the stages of infancy. I think we'll name it after one of the suggestions from the blog.
Posted by: Buddha | March 23, 2004 at 11:12 AM
Am I the only one who thought this was really easy?
Posted by: looneygirl | March 23, 2004 at 11:58 AM
No looney. I think it was meant for the challenge challenged.
Posted by: twopuppies | March 23, 2004 at 12:00 PM
5:09 pm productivity 0 want to go to the gym and lie naked in the steam room
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:11 PM
There once was a camel named Janet,
Whose bra was bigger than Thanet.
And poets wrote rants,
Praising her ginormous pants,
Which they sang all over the planet.
Posted by: BarryFS | March 23, 2004 at 12:21 PM
Everyone is flashing their nipples nowadays. from now on I am going to walk around shirtless. That way I can flash two instead of one
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:30 PM
This day could,nt go slower
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:33 PM
there was once a nipple
that caused such a ripple
it once poped out of her dress
long enough for the press
to make the woman Janet
the talk of the planet
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:37 PM
there was once a nipple
that caused such a ripple
it once poped out of her dress
long enough for the press
to make the woman Janet
the talk of the planet
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:37 PM
there was once a nipple
that caused such a ripple
it once poped out of her dress
long enough for the press
to make the woman Janet
the talk of the planet
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:37 PM
sorry about the triple posting Enter key on the keyboard got stuck
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:39 PM
NEW TOPIC
LETS TAKE A POLL
DAVE BARRY IS
a)Ugly
b)Average Looking
c)GoodLooking
d)A Hot sexy stud
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:43 PM
There was an old topic?
Posted by: nouti | March 23, 2004 at 12:45 PM
yes my nipples and Janet's Nipples
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:50 PM
yes my nipples and Janet's Nipples was the old topic
Posted by: David | March 23, 2004 at 12:50 PM
He's a guy, dude.
Posted by: twopuppies | March 23, 2004 at 12:57 PM
Ewww
Posted by: JCT | March 23, 2004 at 12:57 PM
Oh, look at the time. I'll leave you all to it then, seeing whose nipples are the oldest or whatever. I've got a meaningful date with a Guinness.
Posted by: nouti | March 23, 2004 at 01:01 PM
judi, we need a better nightcap than mosquito-swatting. Got one behind the bar?
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 01:23 PM
For the record, I am not the Guinness nouti has a date with.
Posted by: Barbiguinness | March 23, 2004 at 01:36 PM
its sad that i haven't been able to keep up with the comments this week, and every time I try, i get down to the bottom of the list and either (a) forget what I was going to add or (b) realize that every comment I was going to make was already made. I need to stop working so much, and get back to the blogging...
Posted by: paperclip | March 23, 2004 at 01:50 PM
Lookin' good for 100, Punky ;-)
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 02:19 PM
Chianti right? I'll make a note and keep the attic stocked...what can I say, there are no cellars in Hell.
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 02:30 PM
Anytime now, I 'spose.
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 02:42 PM
They already called roll down there, Punky. Yuo weren't there so I hollered 'Yo' when your name was called. Just looking out for ya.
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 02:52 PM
College finals are part of the road trip to hell. I know I did a lot of my best sinning during those hours of procrastination while I was supposed to be studying; and in the week afterwards, where I was sober only long enough to receive the diploma.
Posted by: paperclip | March 23, 2004 at 02:53 PM
Ahh, enlightenment, now I know why you call yourself "paperclip" huh?
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 02:55 PM
Good for you, Graz! I been here so long and late to the gate as always, I'd hate to miss Punky!
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 02:57 PM
eh, the 'paperclip' nickname is just cuz I'm wholly uncreative, and happened to be playing with a paperclip while I was trying to think of something...
well, now its 5, and I get to leave this lovely desk job of mine (help! save me from the paperclips!!!) and head off to the hotel (god I'm tired of working on the road!) which means no more blogging tonight.
Have fun all! Hope its another record setting night like last... give me lots to entertain myself with in the morning! =)
Posted by: paperclip | March 23, 2004 at 03:01 PM
alex, for your future; all roads eventually lead someplace...and down is easier than up.
On your "hallway problem", I was once in a hospital so big they had telephones in the halls just for if you got lost. No, I wasn't there for me.
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 03:01 PM
MeL, your name was called too, but that voice in my head answered for ya....so, you're covered.
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 03:04 PM
MeL, it is written: You must needs go to LA if only to find out if you still have vestiges of innocence left from this blog...or LA's just ho-hum, been there, done that, and I didn't even need a T-shirt ;-)
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 03:06 PM
Dave Barry is (A). Perfect for joining my cult and reserving a place for himself in the underworld.
Posted by: vulcan | March 23, 2004 at 03:12 PM
definately the "awe of such oddity" one. This is Dave Barry's blog, right?
Posted by: vulcan | March 23, 2004 at 03:18 PM
underworld, alex. underworld.
Posted by: vulcan | March 23, 2004 at 03:19 PM
I'm lost.
Posted by: twopuppies | March 23, 2004 at 03:20 PM
What are you trying to say, MeL? That I'm an innocence...ummm...taker..aaah..kinda...person?
I am hurt by that. I might not chat with you using ennuendo and vague references anymore for that comment.
Means I can just out and out say it.....Muhaahaahaa
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 03:22 PM
vulcan? Are you having that 7-year itch? I think a trip to Christine Chapel might be in order for you.
(I hope I didn't f*ck that one up since it's been so long since I watched Star Trek!)
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 03:23 PM
the underworld is a different place in my book. In Roman mythology, I am the "god of fire," not to mention smithing, metallurgy, and a god of the underworld. The internet is a very useful source for finding this sort of information.
Posted by: vulcan | March 23, 2004 at 03:23 PM
OK. if people start relating me to Star Trek, it's time for me to find a new name. It was the Star Trek people who ripped it off the mythology in the first place. Like "Romulans," the "imperial senate" etc.
Posted by: vulcan | March 23, 2004 at 03:25 PM
How 'bout Silvanus? He's the god of uncultivated lands, forests, wooded fields etc. Or I could go for celtic gods.
Posted by: vulcan | March 23, 2004 at 03:28 PM
Ok, Voice-Inside-My-Head. Start spell checking for me before I post something wrong and look foolish.
Ahh, check that....I already look foolish without the mis-spelled words and typos....
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 03:30 PM
I suppose I could use the name of some saint or angel or something, although that would be highly ironic.
Posted by: vulcan | March 23, 2004 at 03:32 PM
I think I'll go be productive for awhile before I dig myself a deeper hole.
*going out of the office to yell at someone who richly deserves it*
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 03:34 PM
I'm out of my league here.
Posted by: twopuppies | March 23, 2004 at 03:35 PM
Repent all ye of your sins. I have turned from my pagan ways and seek only to mend!
Posted by: Gabriel, angel of mercy | March 23, 2004 at 03:35 PM
vulcan, NO! I barely remember Greek and have been known to confuse it with Norse. The bible I understand, the Koran I quit short. If you pass on your Roman wisdom, (and to mention Buddha getting "productive") How will we be able to keep the blog slightly over-keeled, but not yet keel-hauled?
OK, that's a lost one, but I hadda!
P.S. vulcan, when I was heavily into Star Trek (the original) I did recognize the appropriations you spoke of (did I just use polysyllabic language on this blog?!) Forgive me...one more bad habit in hell and I'll have a coven of nuns ;-)
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 03:36 PM
It is too late! You have converted me back to the Christian ways! No longer am to be confused with ancient TV shows, I will touch people with the light of God!
Posted by: Gabriel, angel of mercy | March 23, 2004 at 03:39 PM
The day of judgement is near! Repent all ye lost souls, while ye may. It is not too late yet!
Posted by: Gabriel | March 23, 2004 at 03:45 PM
i didn't particularly enjoy participating in that mosquito game.
Posted by: jason | March 23, 2004 at 03:48 PM
2pups, you have a league? I don't have a league. I wanna league too.
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 03:49 PM
Mosquitoes are agents of hell. You should enjoy smashing them. Take it from me.
Posted by: Gabriel | March 23, 2004 at 03:49 PM
Gabriel, I always believe in finishing what I've started...take a note blog-commenters, there are apparently mosquitoes in Heaven! Hell has no mosquitoes, they burn too quick. But, we're still looking for large lawyers....
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 03:56 PM
They have a special breed of fire-resistant mosquitoes in hell.
Question: if heaven had mosquitoes, then wouldn't that completely change the defintion of heaven?
Posted by: Gabriel | March 23, 2004 at 03:59 PM
Oh yeah, I do forget, twopuppies, if I recall correctly, a league is 3 miles. Yer puppies oughta be able to cover that on the double-quick!
(no offense, Good Puppie-Master, but last night you fell asleep even with Punky abounding. Who'n'thehell do ya think taught me guidance on this here blog-bloat! er, I mean float!)
Jest one for twopuppies, folks. I fear he has not only lost an ocean, but his comeuppance as well ;-)
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 04:04 PM
eadn ... hell hath no mosquitos you say ... guess you won't have to bring the repellent Mel. You're safe.
Now what the hell were you guys talking about?? Two pups and I are spinning in circles trying to figure out if we accidentally sent the blog back to 1980, or if we've just totally missed something.
Posted by: Punky Brewster | March 23, 2004 at 04:04 PM
Apparently you've never been to a mosquito-infested swamp city in Texas (i.e. Houston). They could care less about your status in the afterlife.
Posted by: Gabriel | March 23, 2004 at 04:06 PM
So it's not just me that's confused?
Posted by: twopuppies | March 23, 2004 at 04:06 PM
Feck is a word.
Posted by: Doug Brockmeier | March 23, 2004 at 04:07 PM
Punky, Hell, Heaven, even Earth, by the time I finished writing my twopuppies comment and checked in again, I'm spinning in circles two! Question is which one's the middle!
I do rely on that as I'm always late to the gate!
Posted by: eadn | March 23, 2004 at 04:08 PM
I'm going to back away slowly.....
Posted by: twopuppies | March 23, 2004 at 04:10 PM
eadn ... wanna hold hands while we spin around together???
Posted by: Punky Brewster | March 23, 2004 at 04:11 PM
Punky, eadn, 2pups...I've learned not to pay attention to what anyone is talking about. I'm just typing anything that comes to my head. Those things are easy to track down. Kinda like finding a BB in an empty water pail. And if others are talking about that also..BONUS for me...
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 04:13 PM
Like randomininity.
Randomnality is my middle name.
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 04:17 PM
Can we talk about little debbie snack cakes? Which was your favorite? Or maybe you all were more of the twinkie and devil dog type?
Posted by: Punky Brewster | March 23, 2004 at 04:18 PM
Noooo, not twinkies and HoHo's again.
I like the Banana Flips.
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 04:19 PM
Randomininity should be a word.
The name is Randomnality. Graz Randomnality
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 04:21 PM
What are banana flips? We didn't have THOSE growing up!
Posted by: Punky Brewster | March 23, 2004 at 04:22 PM
Yeah, Banana Flips. Like a little angel food cake with banana cream in it. It's shaped kinda like a taco ;)
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 04:23 PM
Really, I'm not making that up. I wouldn't make anything up and post it as a comment here.
Posted by: Graz | March 23, 2004 at 04:27 PM
must be a southern thing.
I use to love ring dings!
Oh and those hostess cupcakes with the curly q or white frosting across the top!
Ah, youth.
Posted by: Punky Brewster | March 23, 2004 at 04:27 PM
Does anybody remember Bonomo Turkish Taffy? Talk about showing my age here.
Posted by: twopuppies | March 23, 2004 at 04:29 PM