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March 27, 2004


Presenting: Obey the Crab

(Thanks to Jamie Shiner)


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Anyone know where I can get a monkey?

My crab first told me to send him all the money. And then it told me to kiss some pie.


1. He left no address for me to send the money
2. I kiss twinkies, not pie. Clearly this crab has been misinformed!

I want my money back. Oh wait, I didn't send it. Nevermind.

Consider yourself lucky, Ross. I was told to SATISFY a monkey!

*Convulses in terror*

They just keep coming!!!

The crab told me to leave a comment.

I won't dance,
don't ask me
I won't dance,
don't ask me
I won't dance--
madame with yoooou

Okay, the crab didn't tell me to dance, but if he had, that's how I would have responded.

One thing we can always use is a good laugh, no matter how stupid the source. This made me laugh, so thanks Dave!

First it said "F--- off. I'm knackered." So I guess this has a British derivation?

Second was "Send me all your money" so maybe it's trans-Atlantic.

I was told to point to my chair. I did so. Do I win?

That is the strangest game I have ever played

Do NOT let Doug see this site! In the meantime, everyone got their tranquilizer guns handy?

Um sorry, I don't think that's a game. It's just a toy. And not one I'd like to play with again.

Chicken of the sea? It's not even chicken.

O.k., it told me to bite a plant pot. Didn't it really mean pot plant??? And if it did, it would be legal right? I mean The Crab told me to do it!

If The Crab told you to jump off a cliff would you do it??? It's all fun and games until some crab pokes your eye out!

What's with the monkeys? Now it told me to "wax lyrical about a monkey." How does one do that? Never mind, I don't really want to know.

Did it work?

If so, I must add an "Obey c00kie" page to my website with one of those "donate here" links.

It's only fun until someone gets hurt. Then it's hilarious!

The crab told me to wax lyrical about a wookiee. But it spelled "wookiee" wrong, like this: "wookie." And it made me sad that I noticed that right away.

Barbiguinness, with that I don't think it's too early if you wanna get a head start on the brew ;-)

It's all fun and games until someone looses an eye. Then it's a game. Find the eye.

I used to be addicted to that game. Addicted!! But a lot of other weebls stuff is good. Some of it is just...odd.

How long am I supposed to shake my chair? The crab didn't say when I could stop!

I was told to "Defend my sack of some kind". Like I need a crab to remind me to defend my sack.

Especially from crabs.

It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye.

Then it's just fun you can't see!

Sweet MeL, (no face-mauling attempted :-) I was kinda hoping for a firing squad if necessary...seems once he gets his Cheez-wiz up, he's be hard to stop!

MeL, I only meant with tranquilizer darts, should be reasonably clean, but ya gotta admit Doug's hard to take down when he goes on a tear.

Good thought though if Kinky Tinky and friends? show up again...just point him and let him blow them away with his Absolutely Inimitable style :-)

Agreed, MeL, but not to get into my personal "real", sometimes he really is too much and hopefully he will read this and just blame me!

I would like to suggest to him that he listen to the melody of us all and not just bang away on his own drums!

Much apologies to Yourself, but for the Good of The Blog, I have to take this shot. Thanks! :-)

Again I do agree, MeL! By the way, I noticed you checked out the latest judi-panty-post. heh heh So did I ;-) Shall we adjourn upstairs? Namely 'cause I get lost tracking myself on my blog-shoes :-)

Most of you look quite normal to me. Is that good?

Just say "when", Sweet MeL! (it ain't no fun if you aren't enjoying it too! :-)

The crab told me to "Jig around a moneymaker". Does that mean go dance at an....ahem...' Gentlemens Club'? It also told me to " Kiss a Moneymaker"...but I don't think I wanna do that.

Naw..I'd do that kinda stuff for free;}

Yes...Yes, oh evil crusty master...

Nobody asked. And I do requests.

Disclaimer: I only accept female clientele.

MeL, fun for who? It would be very fun for me. That's the important thing;{)

Graz ... you free this weekend? ;)

Don't forget your penguin and chain link g-string undies, Love.

MeL, of course your fun is important. Feel free to enjoy yourself with any available methods. I do provide said methods also.;{)

Punky, the penguin went on a date with the Yeti. (Some people you just can't talk in to leaving the abusive relationships that they are in.) Will a fun-loving seal with a slightly strained neck work?

Yup. Seal works for me.

*sigh* Will that penguin ever learn.

Well, when they left, I saw a spiked club in the Yeti's back pocket. I tried to warn the penguin that he was up to no good, but Pingu told me that Orca was going as a chaperone, but I remember the last time the three of them got together, I had to go pull Pingu out of an iceburg. I hope it turns out better this time, but I also saw a load of land mines in backseat of the Yeti's Volvo.

I think our brave little Penguin is really just selfless, MeL. I mean, Pengu gets smacked around, chopped into bits, flung against icebergs, stuffed full of male twinkies and yet still keeps coming back for more … all for the sake of our entertainment. What a sport!

Haha! Just think how fun this game would be if we knew what a wookie and a wax lyrical were!
...But could someone else find out, please? I sent all my investigation money to a crab.

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