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March 24, 2004

CAMBODIAN TOURISM UPDATE

This is just wrong.

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

Comments

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OK, that was weird, but SOMOLIA was REALLY weird.

"At least, we would try to make sure they were not kidnapped, though it can happen."

Not that he's had any chance ot pracitce, with no tourists for 14 years.

Did Dave bring us back a worlds largest tapeworm t-shirt from the Parasite Museum? That was in Terre Haute, right?

I can imagine the souvenir t-shirts at the South Korean theme park:
"Where do you park your penis?"

Okay kids, everyone in the car...we're going to the Penis Park!

And those are just some of the fascinating points of interest on the Highway to Hell.

Making good progress, MeL. Here, have some more Peeps.

In response to why not one tourist went to Somalia, the minsister said, "I can't understand this. "I'm sure tourists would leave Somalia alive and I'm hopeful they wouldn't be kidnapped." Then, "At least, we would try to make sure they were not kidnapped, though it can happen."

This makes me consider the following ways to solve their tourism problem:

1) Why not have two or more tourist ministers for this hotbed of travel activity? Surely the tourists ratio to travel ministers is too low.

2) The minister(s) should re-market for REAL adventure travelers. "The Kidnap Capital of the World!"

3) Let TV have a go at it. "Survivor: Somalia"

And the scary thing is I know people who would want to do this.

Sounds like they need the rocket launchers in Somalia!

Sadly, I acutally know someone who DID this while he was in Cambodia...... Yes, I do have odd friends.

The Parasite Museum? Penis Park? Firing rocket launchers at cows? Where's my passport? Damn, the U.S. is a boring country. Why don't we have any of those great tourist attractions here? I know I'd wear a Parasite Museum t-shirt.

Hey, I WENT on that sewer tour in Paris. WHat a big ripoff! We waited for a couple of hours, then got dragged (in a boat) a few hundred yards through a sewer, and they wanted a tip for that!

One more: you don't need to drive a couple of hours from Rome for this one (assuming it's still open). At the Capuchin Church just off the Via Veneto in Rome they have skeletons of former monks arranged on the walls and ceilings in a way cool display! Some rooms have various bones artistically displayed, and other rooms have full skeletons, some in beckoning poses! And the living monks wandering around are pretty spooky and look like they're meansuring your femur for that last space on the wall. Highly recommended!

>This is just wrong.

Wrong... or right?

Now if we could only smuggle Barry Manilow to Cambodia in a cow suit....

I guess sticking firecrackers up cat's butts is totally passe uh? Whats next? Will we be able to shoot elephants with a tank? Mortar a flock of ostrich?. RPG water buffalo? Torpedo killer whales? Call in airstrikes targeting the San Diego Zoo?

/Ping Ping Ping ping Ping Ping

Fire control: Orca bearing two zero niner at 10 knots, depth fifty, I repeat fifty meters!!!

Tourist: Let me know when you have a lock!

Fire control: We have a lock!!!!

Tourist: Fire tubes two and three!!!!!

Fire control: Fish away!!!!

Ping Ping Ping ping Ping Ping

Hit! I say again direct hit! Catfood!!!!!!

Tourist: Yessssss!!!!

Damn, where's PETA when we need them?

Combar Controller: Apache 62, control.

Tourist: Apache 62.

Combar Controller: Confirm location please.

Tourist: Two five miles so. west of S.D. Wildlife Park, over.

Combar Controller: Rodger, I have you now. Proceed directly to SDWP.

Tourist: Rodger. Turning Comm. over to my EWO, Tango 1.

Combar Controller: Copy that. Tango one, control over.

Tourist: Tango one.

Combar Controller: Tango one, what is your target?

Tourist: Tango one, I am looking at the group of deer looking things in the NW quadrant.

Combar Controller: Negative, I repeat, negative. Those are endangered east african plains gazelles.

Tourist: O.K., how about the large herd of Giraffe in the SW quadrant.

Combar Controller: Rodger, plenty of long necks around, you are clear to fire 20mm guns at the herd of giraffe in the SW quadrant. Coordinates 240 SW X 220 NE. Keep 2000m buffer from fire zone and I-5. Note: Wildlife park opens in 3 hrs. Over.

Copy all, rolling in, fire up the Barby!!!!

hmmm...shoot a cow? That doesn't seem very sporting. Cows are slow and dumb. I guess that they are not HUNTING the cows, just using them for targets. Could a cow stop a rocket? It seems to me that the rocket would continue on it's way after decimating the cow, and destruct what ever is beyond the cow as well.

BMX3, take a timeout and your meds of choice, thanks! :-)

If PETA ever finds out about this...

Do you really think this is funny?

sam.

not in the slightest.

punky.

I want $400 now. :(

And airfare.

Concrete proof that guys should continue ruling the world? I think so. I think so.

PS- Sure, some movie cannot do without explosions, but I know of many moives that I would have been much more impressed with had they involved exploding cows as well. Imagine the possibilities...

Oh my gosh, that's terrible! Where's PETA?? In this case I'd actually side with them. (whoah)

bill, i briefly looked over your crappy page. far be it from me to call you a liar. but i didnt see shit about any damned tapeworm. when you find the time please email me at the above adress with pictures of the worlds biggest tapeworm

bill, i briefly looked over your crappy page. far be it from me to call you a liar. but i didnt see anything about any damned tapeworm. when you find the time please email me at the above adress with pictures of the worlds biggest tapeworm

i want to shoot a waterbuffalo with a RPG. just once. i mean how many people can say they have done something so pointlessly stupid and cruel. really unless your completely insane , this IS a good idea. hell ,i bet Dick Cheney and George Jr. have a weekend getaway planned. i will be saving my euros for a trip to cambodia. do they have a website?

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