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March 24, 2004


Don't even think about it.

(Thanks to Thad Humphries, whose wife might be interested to know the subject line of his email)


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It looks like the requirements would seriously cut into your "productivity" time anyway, Punky.

Hey, Martha Stewart might have a teaching career lined up for her--you know, if that little jail thing doesn't work out.

So she took a left turn at Tijuana and landed in 1952. But my question is: how can she teach a sexual relations class for married women, when everyone knows that Lucy and Ricky slept in separate beds?

......have to put up with philandering husbands..........while eeking out a living.........keep the girls (women, chicks, whatever) in school. Housewiving is the worst unpaid job in history. I tried it for two years with a baby........it really is a raw deal, plus, you have to ASK for money!

Either that or Mrs. Ricardo had some serious 'splaining to do about how Little Ricky came to be...

"You must never, ever scrape the plates in front of your guests ...." That's right. Let the dogs
clean them off for you.

Bangi_gurl's School for Women:-
lesson 1-MEN 101
While men may not be accessories,they make for great lawn ornaments--esp in those hot undies we see today.
Lesson 2-How to use a handcuffs and blindfolds.
on them.not u.

disregard misuse of article.khek.

When I was in college (1998), those students in the Business College were required to attend an Etiquette Dinner. It was a five course meal and several faculty attended. This was to teach students how to engage in small talk, to know which fork to use, where the napkin goes, don't talk with your mouth full, etc. It prepared them so that when the student was out at a business lunch or dinner, they would not embarrass themselves and ruin their career with a horrendous lapse of manners.

You may laugh and poke fun at this, but manners really are largely lacking in society today.

teacher Tota Topete
In Puerto Rico, Tota is a bad word for a woman's "parts"

My husband is the etiquette authority in our house. He went to Valley Forge Military Junior College and took an entire course in etiquette. The military has formal dinners called "Dining Ins" for officers. I went to one once; it was fun in a "that was a great experience" kind of way, but I didn't immediately call my family to tell them about it.

I am a stay-at-home mom and it is a very thankless job, Eykis. My hope is that, eventually, my children, who will probably never thank me for giving up a career in chemistry, will not end up in jail. I love the culinary side of my job, but I have never tried to smuggle snails.

Hey Jessica, I gave up a career in chemistry to stay home with my kids too. Haven't used much chem at home but I figure it will come in handy when the science fair projects start rolling in.

teacher Tota Topete
In Puerto Rico, Tota is a bad word for a woman's "parts"

teacher Tota Topete
In Puerto Rico, Tota is a bad word for a woman's "parts"

In our school district, the elementary and alternative ("bad kids") school both teach and practice the "Boys Town Skills". They break down such skills as "How to Accept Criticism," "How to Give Criticism", "How to Apologize." It has made a difference with my kids, I know, because the teachers are not ignoring problems, but teaching proper "common-sense" responses to everyday situations.

To have my 11 year-old stop himself, then acknowledge that he's heading in the right direction, make apology, and correct himself is amazing. If he keeps it up, he'll be a much more wonderful young man.

I meant heading in the wrong direction.


You're right, Alex. Manners are supposed to help avoid embarassing situations, or, failing that, to help you extricate yourself gracefully from them.

Etiquette classes would be a great thing to re-institute in schools...we know that kids sure aren't getting much instruction in manners at home. (Not the kids in my neighborhood, anyway...SHEESH, what a bunch of rude little monsters...and the parents are just as bad!)


MOTW: I'm afraid most (hell, probably all) of our politicians (I won't point fingers at any one party here) are deficient in those Boys Town Skills your son is currently mastering (good for him). I mean, "Don't make excuses"? "Where are the MWD, Secretuary Rumsfeld?" "No, we haven't found them yet but we've only had a year. They're out there somewhere, and I'm sure they'll turn up after the election, along with someone who saw W in Alabama in 1972." (Sorry, got carried away there. Whichever party is in office would answer the same way.) :)

THat was WMD, of course, not MWD.

I agree with you there, Psychocat...classes in manners would be appreciated. I was never allowed to be a brat; my parents put the fear of God in me!

They also need to start teaching grammar again, but they'd have to teach the teachers first...

My mother and this woman should meet. My mother thinks you work 8 hours a day at "public work" and then go home and work like a dog and treat your husband like a king. Decent manners and cleanliness aside, let's get real people. If my house doesn't attract vermin, my family is fed (from McDonald's or Wendy's or whoever has a drive thru)and the kids are clean, I am happy and my husband damn better be happy too. If my man wants better treatment at home he can go the extra mile and make enough money so I can stay at home and raise the kids and hire a few things done around the house. Unfortunately this would most likely involve him working 2 jobs like my Dad did, and he was dead at 53. There's a lesson here somewhere, like maybe marriage is a partnership and material things need to take a back seat in life to what matters? You think?
But if anyone out there has struck this perfect medium, please let me know.

Anyway, if you've stuck with this post this long you need a funny. I know of a husband and wife who were such bad housekeepers that the husband/dad was sitting on the toilet in the middle of the night and watched a wharf rat drag a banana down the hall. No lie. The wharf rats chewed up the plastic piping under the house too. Fortunately, they didn't have any small children in the house at the time.

I take time to talk to my kids' friends about telephone manners, etc. (Using a eye contact and a pleasant tone of voice, of *course*.) It's amazing to hear them change from "Hi. Lemme talk to Sue." to "Hello. This is Jessica. May I please speak to Sue?"

Take the opportunity when you have it. Most folks'll appreciate it.

I just know I would be much happier if that BITCH I married would put a posy of flowers in the bathroom or embroidered some initials on the towels.

I'd call her and suggest it to her right now, but she's at home taking a siesta in preparation for our little "do it - and with passion" session.

My wife... I think I'll keep her.

Remarkably serious conversation for this blog! :)

Wendy, did they ever get rid of the wharf rats? (Or move?)

MeL: It's not like that, honestly. You go to the park, read to the kids, play with your pets, meet for lunch. Marry the man for who he is, not what you want to make him become.

Don't get me wrong: I work a day job and go home and work my "other" job. I get monetary remuneration for one. Sometimes get appreciation, too.

Multiple comments:

I'm not allowed to do laundry. But I do lots of dishes. Dishes don't shrink or fade.

My cure for kids who start a phone conversation with "Is Mikey there?" is "Who wants to know?" Once a kid called in the wee small hours of the morning on a week night asking for one of mine, I asked, "Who wants to know, and is your dad up? Well, wake him up and let me talk to him."

"Who wants to know?" works well on telemarketers too. If that doesn't throw them off their script, then come right back with "Why are you calling?"

My husband and I have a happy medium. I cook and clean, he does laundy, dishes and takes out the trash. But then again, we don't have kids and don't plan on it for a looooong time.
Urgh, this article made me want to barf. IF housework skills are so importent, why don't they teach them to the boys as well?

I sense some very angry working spouse stuff here. As a CPA I noticed something strange. If you add up all the taxes a working couple pays (Fed, State, Fica, Property, Sales, Cigs, Gas, etc) it comes to about 40%. Add in daycare and 1 of the 2 incomes needed to run a household is just to pay the taxes. When I was born (50's) it was less than 17%, that's why Mom could stay home. Please direct your anger at the voting booth in November against the party that always raises taxes. Hint: it's not the elephant party.

Oh, I do! I have chores lists and my daughter and oldest son swap lists every two months. Both are learning laundry, cleaning, dishes, etc.

And our wardrobes needed some updating, anyway.

I cook, I clean, and I set pants ablaze. In a good way I mean. (Not always with kimchee)

Interesting commenting all. The most I can say is my parents put me through the basics of manners, cooking, cleaning and "general" maintenance. Good enough foundation and it seems to make life go a little smoother for all for a little extra effort. Any corruption (like myself on this blog ;-) is solely my own responsibility. Thanks for listening.

I cried when I was told "the Stepford Wives" was fiction.
Worse than when I found out Santa was not real.
Life is full of such sad moments.

Nothing says affection like posies of flowers in the bathroom and well folded napkins.

Actually, I wish I'd even gotten that much out of my last relationship...

It's like a wonderful cruise with glorious evenings of dancing, drinking, parties and fantastic s*x!

Then it hits an iceburg and the screaming and dying begins...

Nice metaphor, Lee. :)

Oh, and props to Punky for taking the words out of my mouth.

Well said and well sat, Punky! (and I liked that little wiggle too ;-)

Pu your feet up, Punk, I'll get you that Bourbon.

I try to help, but I've been lifetime-banished from the laundry room ever since the "everything came out pink" incident.

Punky said: "I don't cook or iron or wash anyone's clothes but mine."

Thanks for not cooking my clothes! However, my sister did that to one ex-boyfriend...

Nicy lazy, righteous (albeit cute,) possibly dirty butt, Punky! ;->

Blognik - thanks! I take it you've been on that trip before...

Steve,I see by your "everything pink" result you have my father's theory. He said the first time you're ask to wash dishes you should "accidentally" drop a big one and you won't be asked to do it again. But seriously, he does most of the dishes. Personally, I do everything but iron (as I work at home and my wife doesn't), but as I wear nothing but jeans and t-shirts I don't require my clothes be ironed anyway.


What was the subject line?

(for Thad's wife)

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