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April 14, 2003


The legendary Rock Bottom Remainders almost-all-author rock band will be playing in Seattle, San Francisco and Los Angeles next week, and we are starting to generate massive publicity in the form of an item at the very bottom of this column. The item dates back to the time when Bruce Springsteen got on stage with us and sang "Gloria." That was in 1994, and afterward he became a huge star. Such is the power of the Rock Bottom Remainders. It is incredible that there are still tickets available.


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Hi Mr. Dave Barry!
Just thought you might be interested in a Q&A session our website is having with Rock Bottom Remainders founder and singer Kathi Kamen Goldmark.
We have asked Kathi several questions about the band and they will be answered on our message board ...and our Rock Bottom Remainders tribute page within the next week.
Maybe you and your listeners/readers would be interested!
I think Mr. King may even check it out.
We'd also like to ask if you would consider answering some RBR questions for another segment we are planning?????

Mark Orr
Bobbles and More


I like it, I'll take it, sold.

*raises hand*
3rd's the idea.
*explores the shadows*

*checks acoustics and measures for turntable installation*

Not bad, not bad at all...

Why did Mark Orr post on March 25 of this year?? *confused*


We're here! Very comfy! And DJT likes the acoustics, so we should have a concert tonight!

Pick a playlist, DJT!

neo - good to see you! Maybe "Mark was just trolling through the blogs - or - pssst! - maybe it's come karmic connection to the blog clock! OOOPS - did I just say that outloud!

*zips in and falls with a big splash into Hot Tub*

*Does the Sopping Wet But Happy Happy Dance*

*sets up hammock*

*goes to look for frig to put Moatarita mix in*

Jeff - is Mrs. Robinson for me???? How did you find out???

Is HE bragging?

Oh, sure. Move while I'm in mid-post.

OK, I'll just post it here as well:


Mr. Fishair, you rang?

I forgot my laptop today and can't listen. Is there a song with "Donna Jo" in the lyric?

I remember "Don-na oh oh Don-na", "Donna Donna, my prima dona".

Then there's the punk rock group, The Donna's

*drags in Moatarita mixer (with snoozing Wysi still chained to it) and sets it on bar*
He's heavier than he looks. Hope the drag marks on the floor can get shined out.


So now I'm, what, 3 1/2 MOATs behind?

Pssst, Eleanor is sopping wet, pass it on...

*zips in with electric floor buffer*

no problem, wolfie!

Ok... I actually had things to say, but ya'll had to go and move and make me forget it all! *pout*

Stoopid baby-ziemers. *sigh*

So wheres the ladies room? Anyone?
*trying not to be sick*

*forgetting nausea to dance to Boys of Summer*

... remember how you made me crazy... remember how I made you scream....

ALMOST as good a song as "Summer of '69" ...

Ah! I'm sitting outside, in the sun, clear skies, few bugs, a drink, and Allman Brothers. Too bad I don't have much battery power left. I may have to regress back to the confines of dorm power soon. Someone already scratched up the MOAT? They deserve to be paddled!

*passes El a nice, fluffy towel straight from the dryer*

I did laundry last night! Nothing in the world beats fresh fluffy towels, except mebbe fresh sheets, IMO.

OHMIGOSH! They are playing "Boys of Summer" on the local station I'm listening to right now. I was reading ... remember how you made me crazy... remember how I made you scream.... as they were singing it.

Well...it IS Opening Day for our Boys of Summer here in STL.

Sooooo.....I got everyone I could, or that I could find a song for. Probably were others, but I got what I could.

Playlist for today:

Friday 4-8-05 Sharecroppers All Request Lunch Hour
“Rosalita” Bruce Springsteen---James
“Beth” Kiss
“Sara” Fleetwood Mac
“Eleanor” Turtles
“Valerie” Steve Winwood---Josh(or Valerie)
“Donna” Richie Valens---Slyeyes
“Michelle” Beatles---Blogchik
“Lovely Rita” Beatles
“Amie” Pure Prairie League
“Amanda” Boston
“Mrs. Robinson” Simon and Garfunkel
“Tracy” Cuff Links
“Susan” The Buckinghams(*snork*)

I still have to finish catching up on the last MOAT. I also, however, think I may go catch up on a little sleep.

(Eleanor, check your email)

*hands Just an Orange and Ginger smoothie to help with the nausea*

It's not a MOATarita, but it sure does help.

what? How did that 'regress' get in there?! Totally inadvertant, It must be this heuTAG (german for today, I hope) affecting my mind...

YEAH! Me too.

No Sly, I just threw in Jo for the sheer cuteness factor.

It was Richie Valenz'z's is.

So much for a consensus.

But no Worries Elaynieor, I have a feeling we can move again come next week. ;)

BoysO'Summer! WooHooo!!

*Picks Sly up and takes her out to the Ballgame*

DJ - mm.... sounds delish!

*writing ginger onto shopping list for the way home*

Sly - *snork* ... I've got ISP like that, donchaknow?

Hmm... *looking at Susan's list* ... many many names I don'tknow. *sigh*

Is that the same "Donna" song that was in that commercial for a debit card -- the guy was getting a tatoo of his girlfriend "Donna" on his arm; but he didn't have enough money, so the guy stopped at "Don" and the singing goes from Oh Donna to Oh Don.

I love that commercial.

(My ex's name is Don).

And NO, it WASN'T cute!!

I am, of course, not suggesting that Jame's name is Rosalita, but he had requested it, and it was a name, so it fit in.

And I haven't talked to Josh, but I remembered the Valerie thing, so I just put him down for that one...just because.


We can do anything you want, Mr. Fishair, because I think I can speak for all of the MOATettes when I say, YOU ARE OUR MAN!!!!

Weren't you going to play a part in recording the Valerie episodes for us, Susan?


A Nap sounds delish too.....

*snorking @ image of Josh as "valerie"*

Since we are on the Juggernaut thread, I suggest we try to stay here through the 18st, which I believe is Juggling Day. The connection? Jugs, of course. (@)(@)

Wow, I was finally here for a MOAT move....for the first time in ....uummm.....9 monthes or so......

stupid RL.....

psst! there's a new member over at the ReMOAT. His/Her profile is in spanish, and no details are given. Thoughts? Comments?

heute = today
heutig = today's
tag = day

Smarvin, there you go.

Ok, FIRST! thing I have to do is comment on "How can the post originally be dated 14 April 2003 and the ONLY post in March 2005??

*is bewildered, be wilded too*

*running start.. slides outta shadows on stockinged feet.. across newly polished floor.. windmills arms... skids.. slams into far moat wall*
*limps back to meeting with an 'I meant to do that' look on face*

Psst... marvin... that's French. Didn't you notice the outrageous accent?

Unless NAVA stripped the whole thread when they were denying access to various people.

Ok, brought Pliskin and Fluffy. GO FREE!

*pulls LN canister from Howitzer barrel*

THAT had me worried. Where's a good spot for the Slipe & Slide? Anyone?

*unhitches Howitzer and skeet shooter and sets them up*

*looks around for a good "test" object for the calibration round*

Sup Graz!

I don't think we've in here at the same time in 9 errrrr monks or so........

I think I may have even forgot to wish you Happy Birthday, so um if I did.

*extends a friendly Moatarita to Graz*

Happy Belated One Dude.

Ah, but 'heutag' can also be translated into 'hay day', which as we all know is like the first day of hay fever season, which today could be because it is so nice out 'n stuff. But then, I don't get hay fever, so it wouldn't affect me.
Anyway, I'm fairly certain you can also say 'heutag' or 'heuttag', it's just not common. I took german for a few years in high school, and some stuff is still clinging to the insides of my brain.

Maybe the "heutag" is what you said while you sneezed?

heutag! heutag! heutag! D@mn weeds!

Kibby - pls place the Slipe & Slide over there!
*pointing* ------->
Why, Yes, that IS the doorway to my sweet. No explanations should be neccessary!!!

To your sweet what?

pssst, Just's sweet! pass it on!

Kibby, I think he needs to update it:

"DAVE BARRY - Guitar and
vocals. Dave Barry is a humor
columnist for the Miami Herald.
His column appears in more
than 500 newspapers in the
United States and abroad. In
1988 he won the Pulitzer Prize
for Commentary.
Two of his books were used as
the basis for the CBS TV
sitcom "Dave's World," in
which Harry Anderson played
a much taller version of Dave"

Heu = hay

Not having Heuschnupfen (hay fever)I wouldn't have run into that word.

So ends our German lesson for today.

Nice sweet, Just - and I hadn't realized that our MOAT Hot Tub was designed by The Donald! So of course I love it!

kibby, kibby, kibby, I'm so glad you're here - I was just getting ready to send you a where-are-you e-mail, then my son called from Amsterdam, to say the he, too, was OverPoped, but that he Pope had now been planted!

*waits for the yummy smell of baking apple pie to envelope the new Moat*

pssst - kibby is farblonzhet! Pass it on!


*arranges Slipe & Slide perpindicular to Just's "Sweet" Suite front door*

*preps with enough LN so they pass right on by*

There that'll tease her.

Oops. Mitch Albom apparently doesn't have good psychic skills.

With Weasel on the job, He's never Farfrompoopin.

*takes off full speed for the Slipe n Slide*

Just - of course we brought the Cabana Boys - they're downstairs getting dressed - or are they getting undressed? I better go take a look!

Susan's playing Let's Hear it for the Boys
how appropriate!

*locking JP Stumble on the LAST thread*

UGH. My "OFF" link didn't work!!!
*hiding HTML badge behind back*

Kibby - LN? que es? And haven't ya ever heard its mean to tease a pregnant lady???? ;)

I hardly every understand what's going on here anymore but I do know one thing - fags at half staff made me laugh until I cried.

The answer is; Mitch Albom

Question: Why don't people believe what they read in the paper anymore?

Peri, sometimes I feel as though I'm channeling Inspector Clouseau.

"I submit she shot him in a rit of a fealous jage!"

LN, Liquid Nitrogen.

Mad gave it to me. It's used to deep freeze the S & S to improve performance.

Performance Improved Slipe & Slide®

Hope we don't get turned in for using steriods!

Eleanor, thanks for thinking about me! I've the apple pie right here.

Did I say it was good?

Na. Didn't think so.

kibby - ha ha... ok. :)

*going to read Mitch link*

El - it better be the latter! ;)


kibby: wouldn't extreme cold freeze all the water on the S&S? We'd have to put on more layers to play, which seems to me to be the opposite purpose of a S&S (motto: "Top Party Wedgie Supplier for 54 years")?

ok. I'm going home. ya'll kids have fun this weekend... :)

does this MOAT have a name yet?


I dunno Neo.

you got sumptin in mind?

Mr. Fishair, what I've got in mind isn't fit for a family blog.

Oh, did I say that out loud?

And OHHH, you meant for a name!!! Nope, got nuttin'

In the Y I named it RBR MOAT. That fine?

Smarvin, adding clothes IS NOT an option. IF I recall properly, we were trying to perk-up the gals interest....

think I'll stop there

Hmm, this is the Nineteenth MOAT. And it's about the Rock Bottom Remainders. Of which Stephen King is a member. Coincidence? I think not!

Oops, the nineteen should have been underlined, not all indented and stuff. I confused my tags. *turns in HTML badge*

p.s. I like JuggerMOAT myself.

Waaayyyy LTTG (speaking of which, anyone heard from eadn lately?), but:

Susan: CONGRATULATIONS! Well deserved! It's nice to know they appreciate you (almost) as much as we do. :)

Lab: In regards to naming yourself MOAT Pope and asking everyone to kiss your ring, um, where, exactly, is your ring located???

Marie: Can't wait to meet up! I'll email on the weekend.

Wolfie: I agree with Deon re: your blurker status. I appoint myself new MOAT blurker in your place.

*snatches Wolfie's badge and makes a run for the deepest, darkest shadows*

*smacks into wall*

*limps back to work*

Having been the victim of a Liquid Nitrogen Attack by a sadist masquerading as a dermotologist who said, Oh, Let's remove that freckle on the top of your hand - this won't hurt a bit - Loudest Scream Ever! - I respectfully request tht all canisters of LN be removed immediately! In other words, Get that Crap out of Here!!!

A little (lot) LTTG on just about everything, but I'm caught up to 40 mins ago.

*unpacks veelvet whip hammock and locks toychest in deeeep dark cupboard at the back*

One request... please make sure you use the full name of the Performance Improved Slipe & Slide at all times. There will be no acronyming in the MOAT. Just askin' is all.

Sly... you do the best typos of anyone I know!

Just.... thanks for the pic of the Donald's hot tub. I could handle that. As long as I didn't have to handle the Donald!

oohhhh Tequila Sunrise!!

I'll handle The Donald, kaf, Thank you very much!

My, conversational this afternoon.

Marvin, on recording the Valerie thing...yep, I was going to. I have the scripts, a version Josh recorded without the Rachel part, and part that wysiwyg recorded as the announcer...then before Josh could get together with Rach to record, well, it just never happened. The last time we had talked about it, he had thought she would record it, but apparently it didn't happen. So maybe something will come of it, but I don't know what or when.

With this being dated April 14, 2003, I'm pretty sure that is well before comments were enabled on the blog, and when past entries were moved to this new site, they got comments. Apparently no one went back and commented on this one, other than Mark, and possibly a load of spam that got cleared by nava.

*sobs quietly in shadows*
I've been stripped.

Of my blurker badge. And just what did you think I meant?
I need a new badge.
*slinks away to find new badge, or, steal another*

We're back. I thought it would be fun if Susan did a MOAT request hour, so I asked for Elenore, Donna, Michelle, Lovely Rita and Susan. The others came from elsewhere. I'm sure I could have thought of more given the time, but when I did it I never expected to see them all on the same day. Thanks to Susan!

Serious note from MCRE to Peri, DJTony & other bloglits who smoke: "Every cigarette you smoke takes 7 to 11 minutes off your life."

So stop! We need you here! (That is all.)

I loved Delbert McClinton. Did you know (I know that you did, Susan) that Delbert did the harmonica part on Bruce Channel (pronounced like Chanel)'s "Hey! Baby" back in the early 1960s?

"Giving it up for your love..."

WCRE. Sheesh!

Maybe it should be WCRS, huh Jeff?

WCRS---I like that.

Wolfie stripped??!!?

Dang I missed it.

*whips up shiny new badge*

*Aims it towards the slinks*

Jeff- Sweet job on the song selection, seriously some strong sounding shards sorted somewhat by Susan.

yoinks - we've moved again....

*installs dusty Twister-Mat Dispenso-Matic machine*

We haven't had a good game of naked twister in a while. Still, we know where it is when we need it.

*strips nekkid and CANNONBALLS into the RBR Moat*

Hey all. Just wanted to wish you crazy kids a Happy Weekend and let you know that even though I don't post regularly on here, I do keep my MOAT shortcut updated so I can always find you.

Love and hugs!!!!!!

Higgy brought the Twister-Mat Dispenso-Matic machine and stripped nekkid and cannonballed into the Moat.

Ahhhhh; just like the good ol days.

God's in His kingdom and all is right with the world.


What do you MEAN the Cardinalss are down 1 - 4?!?!?!

And I hear tell they just planted the pope. But that could just be a rumor.

Good Times.
Good Times.

Almost Heaven Susan, you were reading my mind, I was thinking we haven't had any John Denver for a while!

One more. Here's part of today's entry from Dave's page-a-day calendar:

I'm not the only taxpayer who has no idea what he's sending to the IRS. This year, only 28 percent of all Americans will prepare their own tax returns, according to a voice in my head that invents accurate-sounding statistics.

Even Jackie laughed at that line.

PUNKY!!!!!!! *big hug!*

sly.. going down on whom?


Oh, and by Cardinals, of course you know I'm talking baseball....not the guys in the funny hats.

Which reminds me of a funny routine several years ago ... but I'll have to post that later.


*rubs sore spot on heinie*

You think I'd be used to that by now.

Kudos to Weasel! That must have taken mucho, mucho work!!!!!


(no, Rumour Mill, I don't have the clap, I just gave it to Weasel)

You sure Fish? Can I check?
*snaps on rubber gloves*

The FDA ordered Pfizer Inc. to pull Bextra from pharmacies because the painkiller was linked to rare but sometimes fatal skin reactions.

I probably shouldn't laugh at this, but I did (in a dark humour kind of a way). If you were one of the unlucky few that caused Bextra to be pulled off the shelves, would you care that your fatal skin disease was rare? I know I wouldn't.

Then again (ticket for Handbasket Condos please!) I laughed at the irony the first time I heard the news report about the British scientist who came to NZ to work for a US laboratory finding a cure for a particularly nasty strain of Meningococcal B virus was never vaccinated against it, and (probably thanks to mishandling of the viral cells) is now in Wellington Hospital with meningitis. I'm not laughing any more, though, because things are not looking good for her, healthwise, and that's just not funny.

Not as hard as it seems actually. Just go to google image search, look up "letter O", come back, paste the url, go back, look up "letter M", come back paste... etc, etc. Why did I do it? I have no idea.

Yikes. Um, Mad my dear, be very careful! (I know you already are, but, just saying...)

Wow Mike. Impressive.. and DWWINAS for every single one of them!

Don't be modest Weasel - it takes 3 steps to make the link AFTER you find what you want to link to - at least for me!

Sugar Ray!

Way cool!

and to get a google image by itself is another 3 steps (when I do it anyway)so that's (3+3)x9 letters = 54 individual steps... and probably about 15 mins worth of work..


That wasn't meant as a math lesson... but I do have a neat trick for the 9x tables if anyone wants to hear it. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.. I'm going to tell you anyway. You can skip if you want to.

Presuming that you have 8 fingers and 2 thumbs, if you hold your hands out, palms up (after you've finished reading.) Your fingers will now be numbered 1 - 10 (in invisible ink.. that's why you can't see it!) starting with the left thumb and finishing with the right pinky finger. now for each finger you fold down, the number of fingers on the left are the number of tens in the answer and the fingers on the right is the number of ones in the answer.
Eprimer: fold down your third finger (middle left) 3 x 9 = 27.. you will have 2 fingers on the left and 7 on the right of the folded finger. It works for up to 10 x 9. After that.. you need fingers and toes.. or a second set of hands (as long as there's one finger or toe missing)

starting with the left thumb and finishing with the right pinky finger

oops... that should have been starting with the left thumb and finishing with the right thumb

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