CIVILIZATION IS DOOMED

Another store selling cat hats.

(Thanks to Mike Lindsey)

Comments

[Eleanor]

*picks up sly's memorandum and takes it to Law Review Moat to peruse it in quiet*

[Eleanor]

*looks around*

Hmmmm - I see this place already has a spiffy Law Library as well as a complete Drama Section for homage material!

*waits to see if anyone follows her*

.....
.....
.....

[�LabSpecimen�]

*follows*

I found that all of the blog sites were particularly slow this morning. Must have been something going on with the Herald servers.

[Eleanor]

....

[Eleanor]

YAY!!!!!

Yes, I noticed that too Lab, so it may take a while to move all our equipment!

Calling all cabana boys - report for duty immediately!

[Eleanor]

YAY!!!!!

Yes, I noticed that too Lab, so it may take a while to move all our equipment!

Calling all cabana boys - report for duty immediately!

[igloo]

Present and accounted for, Maam!
Would you like a straw with that?

[�LabSpecimen�]

I love this game. Ready?

I just got an email from my ex. The subject line is "Info".

Okay, now you get to describe, as best you can, what the content of the email was.

[Eleanor]

1 - WCRE is back

2 - Tim Henman lost in the second round of the French Open - HAHAHA!!!

[wolfie]

info.. the divorce wasn't as final as yall thought?
*ducks*

*drags in new shadows to hide in*

[Joshkr]

Lab...She's getting breast implants, a lobotomy, and starting her own reality show?

hmmm. She robbed a back and now she's in fo it? (rimsh*t)

That's all I got...off to work with me, later!

P.S. *sends best wishes for Rita's Mia to be ok*

[Eleanor]

Lab - she has a book deal and is writing a "tell all" in which you will figure prominently??!!??

[�LabSpecimen�]

A MOAT Christmas Story
Episode 5

Eleanor: Jeffy! Get up! Get up, Jeffy!
Susan: Joshkr Claus had come!
D'Art: Marvin, you play Joshkr this year. And give Jeff a present.
Eleanor: And I think I see a gift from Aunt Blogchik. She always sends you such wonderful presents.
Susan: Christmas had come. Officially. We plunged into the cornucopia quivering with desire and the ecstacy of unbridled avarice.
Eleanor: Marvin, what did Aunt Blogchik give you? Show everybody.
Marvin: I don't want to.
Eleanor: Marvin, show everybody what Aunt Blogchik gave you.
Susan: Aunt Blogchik had for years labored under the delusion that not only was I perpetually four years old, but also a girl.
Eleanor: Awww. Isn't that sweet? Go upstairs and try it on. Go on.
Marvin comes back downstairs dressed as a ballerina.
D'Art: He looks ridiculous! Go back up and take that off. That's silly.

D'Art: Marvin, did you have a nice Christmas? Did you get everything you wanted?
Marvin: Yeah, almost.
D'Art: Almost? Wait, what's that over there behind the desk?
Susan: I couldn't believe it! My father had gotten me a REAL official Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air rifle! I started to take it out in the back yard to play with it. All I needed was a target. On the way out the door, I grabbed a bar of Lava soap. I took careful aim. Fired. A perfect hit! But in almost slow motion, I could see a chunk of Lava soap flying through the air back towards me, spinning, and finally landing square in my eye.
Marvin: Waaaaaaa!
Susan: Mom had to leave the turkey on the table and take me upstairs to fix my eye. Sometimes at the height of our reveries, when our joy is at its zenith when all is most right with the world the most unthinkable disasters descend upon us.
Higgy, Polly, Peri, and Neo run into the kitchen and devour the turkey.

Wench: Gratuitous insertion of additional MOATies?
Lab: Uh... an homage?

Susan: That Christmas would live in our memories as the Christmas when we were introduced to Chinese turkey. All was right with the world. Next to me in the blackness lay my oiled blue-steel beauty. The greatest Christmas gift I had ever received or would ever receive. Gradually, I drifted off to sleep, pranging ducks on the wing and getting off spectacular hip shots.

[Tamara - not nekkid]

She's marrying your dog?

[Eleanor]

French Open Update:

Roger Federer is playing someone on one court and Nadal (new teen-age wonder-boy) is playing at the same time! on another court - very rude, IMO! And ESPN is switching back and forth - hmmmph!

[D'Artagnan]

Ele, don't they have PIMP (Picture In Main Picture) these days to deal with this sort of thing?

Oh well, at least Mr. Federer is not playing someone on one court and someone else on another court at the same time.

[�LabSpecimen�]

Okay, the one thing in common in all of your guesses is that SHE was giving ME information. That wasn't the case at all. She wanted to ask me two questions concerning our son and what his plans were.

I sometimes get over 50 emails a DAY at work. The ones that get read are the ones that have a subject line that "calls to me."

One project manager has sent out his project status messages with the subject line "Project Status" and then sent me requests for my current status using the subject line "Project Status". And he wonders why he doesn't always get a response. First, I learn to ignore "project status" because I know what's going on with the people I'm working with, and then he asks me something using the same subject line.

Have I mentioned that People annoy me? lol

[kibby F5�]

*trugges in pulling Huey and Skeeter*

whew, this moving's getting harder and harder. good thing I've gotten the Slip(e) & Slide modified for quick deployments.

(hee, hee, I said 'hard'er)

ta-BOING!

*deployed slip(e) & slide*

*slides out....* coooool

[RumoUrs]

Where, D'Art, on my TV (NO!) or on ESPN?

[Eleanor]

*zips in from French Open*

*sets out KibEl business cards on office desk*

*zips out to watch her beloved
Roger who is wearing a shirt today!

[Marvin]

at least she used the vaguely informal 'Info.' subject line instead of something like 'information allocation request' or 'appeal for status of spawn in near future'. Actually, I don't know what that's better. Come to think of it, either of those two would have been better subject lines than 'Info.'
Geez, what was she thinking?!

[D'Artagnan]

RumoUrs, the PIMP (Picture In Main Picture) is part of the HO (Home Online) package, isn't it?

[RumoUrs]

pssst - D'Art's PIMPing with HO's - pass it on!

[�LabSpecimen� (being mean)]

heh heh... Marvin implied that she was thinking!

[Marvin]

There are crucial moments during public urination attempts? I didn't know that!

*goes out to conduct field studies*

[Susan]

*dashing in with a quick question before catching up*

What would cause a computer to do the odd things this one is doing? I went into Yahoo groups, no problem. Wanted to check Polly's blog, so I used the link. It called up May 11. (I have noticed that on this computer.) I went to My Yahoo...I had to log in again...(hadn't had any problem with groups.) Had to try at least 6 times before it took my name, then had to keep trying to get the password in.

Then went to another computer. Polly's blog came up current. Went from groups to My Yahoo with no problem, didn't have to resign in or anything.

Computers are just weird, obviously.

I had no problem signing into groups on this studio computer, and no problems signing into other sites.

Very odd.

*dashes back out to catch up and line up requests*

[�LabSpecimen�]

*drops a pin*
*ting ting ting*

[Mr.Fishair]

Ha! I thought I seriously killed the MOAT. Good one guys!

Very Funny.

You moved while I was, you know, uh, busy working. I would re-post my dribbling here but it actually works out better that you're all here now, so as not to waste space. It was a helluva a long post.

Anyhoo, feel free to go back in Moattime an read the last few posts of the last Moat, and now I seriously have got to do some werk.

[Eleanor]

French Open Update:

Roger Federer won in straight sets. Second round.

CG is coming over today to hook up *snork* 2nd DVD Player in bedroom:
CG to El: You own 3 (three) DVD's and you need 2 (two) DVD Players???????
El: And your point is.......? And beside, one of the DVD's is a 2-disc set!

[Marvin]

*throws flag at CG's blatant misuse of question marks*

*inadvertantly hits CG in face with the penalty flag*

Uh oh...um, Eleanor, maybe you should kiss it and make it better...

[Eleanor]

Marvin: *smooch*

[Susan]

Wooooo!!!!

Mr.Fishair...thank you! I got the pinin' for the fjords bit! Wonderful!

Lab, I am speechless. I love A Christmas Story anyway...watch it every year. Your version is great! (at least I know 1-4 is...I'm sure 5 is too, but have to catch up on this here new MOAT)

Some mighty mighty creative people here.

[Marvin]

shhh...don't tell her I meant she should kiss CG to make it better!

This brings up an interesting twist to the debate over why guys do stupid stuff (Maude or someone was complaining about it over on the MB a couple days ago). It's possible that guys are just holding out for the slim chance that a 'hot' woman will kiss their boo-boos and make it better. It would definitely explain the horror/fascination with getting kicked in the groinal region (not Albuquerque).

[�LabSpecimen�]

Great sketch, Fish! Er... I know you didn't write it because you're at work and all. But I'm glad you found it lyin' in the corner and took a second to post it on the MOAT, I mean, and all, and you're busy so I won't keep ya.

[Bismuth]

aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

I've got my room all set up now! Bye-bye black, bye-bye depressing quotes, hello "Tahitian Teal" and hello lofting my bed so I actually have enough space to walk around in!

[Susan]

Lab, truly wonderful..I love it.

Rita, best wishes for Mia.

I'm sure there was more I wanted to add...my mind has gone blank. Nothing new there.

[Brat�]

Lab - best thing to do with those Project Status e-mails is set up an inbox agent to send them right to the trash.

[Tamara - not nekkid]

FISH!! FABULOUS!! FIVE GOLD STARS!!

[slyeyes]

Mr. Fish, I went back in time and read your story. I liked the way you worked a request in the middle of it.

By the way, were we all speaking with Cockney accent? Do we have Foreign Accent Syndrome?

Blimey.

[Brat�]

Whew....this moat moving is a chore. I know you "Ladies of the MOAT" love bossing around the cabana boys, but really!

We need to get us a MOAT-hauler.

You know, one of those really big rigs like they use to haul NASCAR race cars. We could just drive it to the new moat and prop the side up.....

Fire up the MOAT-a-rita and popcorn machines....

Spoon up the jello-shots and whipped cream and be back in business in a jiffy.

Whadda-ya-say?

Oh, and of course....fill the MOAT with clean fresh water, rubber duckies and innter tubes...

[Susan]

Brat, that could work...but we do need the cabana boys around...

The playlist for today...

Wednesday 5-25-05 Sharecroppers All Request Lunch Hour
News
“Back In Time” Huey Lewis and the News
------
“Jet Airliner” Steve Miller Band
“Louie, Louie” Kingsmen---slyeyes
------
“Gypsy” Fleetwood Mac
“(You’re My) Soul and Inspiration” Righteous Brothers
------
“What Would You Say” Dave Matthews Band---Mr.Fishair
“Honky Tonk Women” Rolling Stones
------
“The Long Run” Eagles---requested in a story/sketch by Mr.Fishair)
“Magic Carpet Ride” Steppenwolf
------
“Five O’Clock Somewhere” Alan Jackson
“Glory Days” Bruce Springsteen---Amy
------
“Takin’ Care Of Business” Bachman-Turner Overdrive
“Light My Fire” Doors

(Double request listed from Mr.Fishair as I had already played the Dave Matthews when I found the Eagles request. Of course if I had been remotely caught up, I'd have seen that one sooner...)

[slyeyes]

Brat, I just love the looks of sweaty cabana boys in the morning.

or afternoon

evening

nighttime

Crap. Gotta go back to work.

[slyeyes]

Brat, I just love the looks of sweaty cabana boys in the morning.

or afternoon

evening

nighttime

Crap. Gotta go back to work.

[Brat�]

Ok, fine about the cabana boys.

Rumor Mill told me that Joshkr was about to close a deal with Paris Hilton to make the MOAT a stop on her reality TV Show.

[Brat�]

Ok, fine about the cabana boys.

Rumor Mill told me that Joshkr was about to close a deal with Paris Hilton to make the MOAT a stop on her reality TV Show.

[Rumour Mill]

Whispers... Brat® got so excited that Paris is stopping by that he's having multiples

And I think she's bringing lunch. Burgers anyone?

[Eleanor]

Mr. Fishair - Great story - well worth that lonb trip back to the old MOAT and a good way to end it's life, since it was the Fresh Air Moat!!!

I vote yes for the really big rig - but it should have a really big rig driver!!!

D'Art - if Paris is going to stop my the MOAT on her show, maybe you could get your precious
semi-naked Britney to do the same!

[Eleanor]

Today is Lady Godiva's Day -

*puts out Godiva chocolate for all the Ladies of the MOAT*

What?

[Brat�]

Opinion Poll:

NCIS......who else is really piss** that they killed Kate?

[slyeyes]

ME!!!

But I kind of figured that was what was going to happen.

[slyeyes]

ME!!!

But I kind of figured that was what was going to happen.

[Eleanor]

Me too!! I had read that someone was going to die and they had to pick the chick! Hmmmph!

[Eleanor]

Me too!! I had read that someone was going to die and they had to pick the chick! Hmmmph!

[Eleanor]

French Open Update:

Maria Sharapova is having a hard time - tied at 3 each in the third set! She's one of my favorites!

[Mad "about Weasel" Scientist]

Excellent work Fish Excellent work!

*throws a handul of purina Fish Chow and some beer in to the basement*

[Brat�]

Sly - why did you figure Kate? Is it like a soap, when someone gets involved in "another project" they get written off? Contract disputes like CSI?

I would have chosen the "probie".

[Kafaleni]

Okay... for those of you who saw the "Tom Cruise knows everything and has awarded himself a doctorate in endocirinology" article the other day... I've figured it out!!! He's regressing! He sounds like a teenager again, and as everyone knows, teenagers know everything.

I posted this on the last Moat.. but I was past the deadline.

Rita... all the best for Mia. It's hard when you have a sick "baby"

Lab and Fish... *collapses laughing.. again* I think I should probably move my hammock to floor level. I'm down here a lot.

[Eleanor]

Sharapova won.

That is all.

[Kafaleni]

BRAT!!! Say it ain't so!!

Dang the whole US seeing the programmes way before I do thing.

[Kafaleni]

Brat.. sometimes the writers feel they have to do that. For anyone who reads Matthew Reilly and read the last "Scarecrow" book, you'll know what I mean.

*breaks down sobbing all over again*

[Eleanor]

Brat and sly - maybe they'll make her bionic and bring her back next season!!!!

[Brat�]

Sorry Kaf.....

Eleanor - kind of a Bobby-in-the-shower-for-a-couple-of-years-at-South-fork?

I did have a brief thought that they somehow got the bad-guys's rifle and put blanks in and them did an FX move with Kate........NAW

Say Kaf - U watch Vegas?

[Deon]

[Approaches Wys' fire and warms hands.]

[Nods to goddess of smurfages]

[Hands Kibby a pair of conch shells]

[Checks out Leeties, er, lip]

[Secretly takes one of Eleanor's chocolates]

[Offers Blogchik a mapquest printout with directions to the train ticket-sales window]

[Goes to the basement to sample beverages and fish chow with Fisher]

[Brian B]

El,
Sharapova is one of my favorites too....probably for different reasons though. (NTTAWWT if it IS for the same reason)

She's like a Kournikova that WINS!

[Kafaleni]

Brat.. once.

[slyeyes]

My spidey sense tells me Deon's been in the area.

I thought Kate was going to be the one due to

(1) my aforementioned spidey sense

(b) They had been seeming to play with a reluctant attraction (on Kate's part) between Kate and Tony; and

(iii) I have a feeling they are going to bring in someone to create a little sexual tension with Gibbs. Maybe I think that 'cause I've sent in my resume and audition tape. But note: I'm not holding my breath....for long; and

(IV) In the promos, it showed her doing her "secret service take the bullet jump"... I just kinda figured. This may go along with (1) above.

But I don't think Rex really died. Oops, wrong show.

[Mike "Mad's Dork" Weasel]

*snorks up bread crumbs, looking for the rest of the loaf*

I'm hungry.

[Brat�]

There are reasons to watch Vegas ramparts....Oops, did I just type that out loud?

Let's see, in preparation for fall they:

Sell off the Montecito (maybe)
Sam Quits
Nessa and Delinda are being hunted by a spook assasin

They implode the hotel into a big heap of rubble.

Did I miss anything gang?

[�LabSpecimen�]

*produces a large sack of Weasel Chow*

There ya go, Mike.

[Mike "Mad's Dork" Weasel]

Mmmm, "zesty vole flavor!" My favorite! Thanks!

[Brat�]

Sly - what an interesting way to number/letter bullet points (snork)...hmmm...

(b) They had been seeming to play with a reluctant attraction (on Kate's part) between Kate and Tony And that's a bad thing?

The tension thingy is a tried and true plot device...which could be a reason to "promote" it to the star. Or maybe Mark's jealous!

Hey Jethro - Pass the Kate! Thanks!
Here you go Sasha....pull up a deck chair. Hands Sasha a Moatarita
Jello shot?

Make youself at home. There are lots of interesting people here running too and fro..

We got:

Poets
PI's
Lymerick specialists
Zipp specialists
Punk's (couldn't think of anything else for you Punky....Snork)
Ausies
Ruskies
Frenchies
Bangaladesh-ees
Androids - the paranoid type
Sleep deprived
Yanks
Southerners
Californians (keep your distance, it might be catching)
DJ's
Radio "Jocks" - does that apply Susan?
Academics
Geeks
Scientists - Mad and otherwise
Critters - Weasels and Ducks and ....

You get the picture dontcha Sasha. You just relax here by the MOAT...kick your shoes off. Put on a thong and go for a swim PLEASE

[slyeyes]

Re: the interaction between Kate and Tony; what I meant was to take it further between the two of them wouldn't really work. Now they can have a year of Tony dealing with angst.

BUT, most likely, it all had to do with Sasha getting the "David Caruso Syndrome" and wanting to do something else.

HEY!! Callie Duquesne walked off her job on CSI: Miami and it looks like Elena went to Brazil with Ray, SO there are two openings there.

BUT, after they shot up the place last night, I was just forming the thought "where's Ari" when the shot came out of no where and nailed her.

And guess what -- I only saw the last 15 minutes of the show -- starting where the FBI guy and Gibbs were discussing their ex-wife-in-common. (by the way, that guy is just as dweeby as he was on Hill Street Blues) I've got the rest recorded, so I guess I'd better find out what was going on before all of that.

And Jeff, Desperate Housewifes a chick show? I have a few male friends who watch it FOR the chicks -- namely Terri Hatcher and Eva Longoria.

[Eleanor]

Brat - Vegas was fabulous, wasn't it! You forgot what's her name who goes off in the private jet with Rich Guy to forget Las Vegas forever!!!!

NCIS: sly - Mark Harmon already has a thing going and even got laid this season - by some chick from Central - was it Sophia Coppola??

Brian B - Of course NTTAWWT, but I loved the way she beat Serena at Wimbledon - and I love Serena, but (not Serena's butt! NTTAWWT, either!) Maria just showed no fear and tore up the Court - and she's beautiful and, as you pointed out, unlike Kournikova, she can play tennis! All in all, a winning combo!!

OK, I think I caught up!

*zips out to put out Flaming Hot Fritos for CG*

[neophyte]

Wow, I go away for a little while... and the moat went on without me! Who knew! And thank you to Mr. Fisher and Marvin, for helping me dress appropriately for Lady Godiva day.

[Brat�]

Brat floats over the MOAT on a soft cloud of music

I love my iPod....

I haven't listened to Vangelis is quite a while. I forgot how soothing "Five Circles" or "Memories of Green" are.

[Rumor Mill]

Pssst! Brat's flying high! Pass it on!

[Rumor Mill Assistant]

psssst - Brat's fly is open - pass it on!

[Eleanor]

*zips in high on DVD Player*

New DVD Player in bedroom is connected and fully operational! I contributed by finding an extension cord for a polarized (!) plug! CG started to explain - one thingy is larger than etc. - I interrupted and said, casually, Oh, you mean polarized? and then flashed him my "look of death" - he smiled sheepishly - HAH! I win!

So the letter box size is perfect - and - a good time was had by all!!

*zips out to check MB*

[kingw OBDE]

Rita Sorry for the bad news regarding your dog. In the last month we have had one diagnosed with a brain tumor and another with suspicious growths in her ear. Not the one in my picture though.
*Praying for all the sick moatie pups*

[FCDA]

The defense rested and Michael Jackson did NOT testify!!!
Now that's a shocker!

[neophyte]

My lilacs may be gone, but the wildflowers in the pastures and ditches and woods are blooming. This is a very good thing.

[Susan]

Wildflowers are wonderful.

For the most part, any flowers are wonderful in fact.

[slyeyes]

Blooming ditch flowers. Grunge band? C&W band?

[slyeyes]

Just got back from the hospital and Mom is MUCH improved. She has color, she's animated and I SWEAR she was flirting with her male nurse, Tom. And dammit, I wanted to.

[Susan]

Sly...good to hear your mother is doing better.

But I have to say I can't see me flirting with anyone my mother would flirt with.

Actually I can't really see my mother flirting with anyone.

[Eleanor]

That's great, sly - when my mother was in the hospital, she was either slapping the nurse's hands for trying to help her up or flirting with the doctors and male residents or nurses - so you could pretty much judge her condition by her behaviour!
Sounds like your mom's doing better - hooray!

[neophyte]

Why on earth didn't you flirt with your mom's nurse, Sly? And I am very glad to hear your mom is recuperating.

[slyeyes]

Susan, what can I say....Mom's got good taste. He was a cutie, but had a thick hick accent. He was talking about his Aunt Tony, but with his accent, it was "Aint Tony". But he was really nice and good where my Mom's welfare is concerned, that's what counts. He also said he's going to St. Louis University to get his masters in nursing and wants to run a nursing home -- the way it should be, as he said. He'd be good at it.

And now, I'm off to review someone else's medical records. It's for a guy who appears to have faked an on-the-job injury. These guys pi$$ me off.

[neophyte]

My son just got invited to St. Louis for the weekend; he's going to a Cardinals game! I'll have him wave to you when he gets to town, Slyeyes.

[slyeyes]

*checks watch*

*taps foot impatiently*

The night crew appears to be late.

[neophyte]

Night Shift

[neophyte]

or... this one

[kingw MBE LP]

Is there anybody out there, just nod if you can hear me

[Mr.Fishair]

*TOOT!*

Oh, whoops. You said night shi f t.

So, Where'd we put the fart jar?

(G'night Moaties)

[kingw MBE LP]

Neo is it really you. I have been actually working, so I have been away, home and work. Just caught up.

[neophyte]

*nodding wildly*

[neophyte]

(this is just to see if Mr. Fishair really left already)

another Night Shift

[kingw MBE LP]

Actually the movie with Michael Keaton and Henry Winkler was pretty good. As far as Night Shifts go. Kinda glamorized prostitution but what the hey.

[neophyte]

Henry Winkler and Michael Keaton were prostitutes? Wow, I musta missed that movie! ;)

[kingw MBE LP]

Did I mention Shelley Long.