Dave Barry's Blog

FOR GOD'S SAKE, GIVE THESE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT

So they'll put their clothes back on.

(Thanks to Mahatma Kane Jeeves)

THIS JUST IN FROM MYSORE

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

NEW MIAMI MOTTO

It's Not Just Our Roads That Are Dangerous

(Thanks to Gary Meier)

YOU KNOW HOW WE'RE ALWAYS SAYING THAT EVENTUALLY THE DOGS ARE GOING TO GET SICK OF BEING DRESSED UP IN IDIOT OUTFITS, AND THEY'RE GOING TO KILL US ALL?

Well, guess what?

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

IF YOU HAVE EVER THOUGHT ABOUT WRITING A BOOK

You need to watch this.

(Thanks to little brother Sam Barry)

HEY, AT LEAST SHE GOT AN IN-FLIGHT MEAL

Air rage woman bites lover's face

(Thanks to sjhaller)

NO DOUBT THERE IS A PERFECTLY INNOCENT EXPLANATION

Bazooka Found Behind Jack In The Box In Turlock

Professional Journalism Opening Sentence:  A startling find behind a Jack in the Box in Turlock, a bazooka!

(Thanks to Keli Minick)

CREEPING FASCISM

Now they have gone too far.

(Thanks to jon harris)

IF YOU GET UP THAT WAY

You might want to visit the Icelandic Phallological Museum.

(Thanks to sjhaller and Tony Bastarache and Bill Procter)

Update: Here (thanks to Kay Myers) is another version of the story, with this powerful image:

A GROUNDBREAKING LEGAL DECISION

Manboobs 'are not sexual,' says judge

Advisory: Do not click on this link unless you wish to be exposed to a set of extremely non-sexual manboobs.

(Thanks to sjhaller)

CSI: CUMBERLAND COUNTY, TENNESSEE

Couple whack each other with frying pan

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson and Siouxie)

ANOTHER INDICATION THAT THE SCIENTIFIC COMMUNITY HAS LOST ITS MIND

They're breeding cockroaches from space.

Although "SpaceRoach" would be an excellent name for a rock band.

(Thanks to DavCat and Jeff Meyerson)

LIZARD MAN UPDATE

Lizard Man is apparently a dog.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

ANOTHER NATURE ITEM, AS WELL AS A GOOD NAME FOR A ROCK BAND

The Non-Existent Newts

(Thanks to Baron vonKlyff)

THE WILD KINGDOM OF MIAMI-DADE COUNTY

For the second year in a row, we have foxes living in our backyard. This year there are two families. The moms mostly stay in the bushes, looking nervous, while the baby foxes, also known as "kits," or "baby foxes," race around banging into things, like little furred bumper cars. Here are some exclusive BlurCam photos of the kits.

I DON'T CARE IF I EVER GET BACK

The Grand Prairie AirHogs baseball team is giving away a free funeral.

(Thanks to Mike Ester)

Question: The Grand Prairie AirHogs?

FOR SOME GUYS, THIS IS FLIRTING

Office worker awarded £5,000 after boss constantly broke wind in her direction

(Thanks to Justin Barber, Amanda Austin and Matt Filar)

SEAN PENN

Human Rights Activist

GUYS, II

They're not just insane. They're also snappy dressers.

(Thanks to Mr. Gene "The Pulitzer" Weingarten)

GUYS: CRAZY? OR INSANE?

Yes.

(Thanks to Claire Martin)