February 21, 2018

FUN FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY

Mattel, a company best known for its clean-cut Barbie dolls, is set to release a game called Flushin' Frenzy that sends a brown plastic poop flying into the air.

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on February 21, 2018 at 06:15 AM
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TAKE MY EX-WIFE. PLEASE.

Comedian sued by ex-husband after she brings up their marriage in her routine

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on February 21, 2018 at 06:09 AM
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THIS USUALLY WORKS FOR US

Man arrested on several charges, falsely identifies himself as Matthew McConaughey

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

Posted by Dave on February 21, 2018 at 06:08 AM
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CSI: VERMONT

Snow shovel fight brings police to West Lebanon parking lot

(Thanks to Glen Page, who says "I think the weather around here could be a factor.")

Posted by Dave on February 21, 2018 at 06:06 AM
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February 20, 2018

‘DOOBIES MKE BOOBIES’

The York Regional Police Service says they are sorry after a police officer told a number of Catholic high school students that smoking marijuana leads to lower testosterone and growth of male mammary areas.

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 09:01 PM
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WHICH FRANKLY MAKES THEM EVEN MORE DISGUSTING

The Portland Press Herald reports soon after the Unicode Consortium released proposed images of 157 new emojis to be made available this year, Maine residents took umbrage at the lobster emoji's eight legs instead of the correct 10.

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 08:58 PM
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IF THAT DOESN’T WIN HIM BACK, WE DON’T KNOW WHAT WILL

Woman Tases man who tries to leave her

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 08:52 PM
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THEY MAKE ‘JA-JA’ SOUNDS

Snake alert sparks great imagination among great tits

(Thanks to Another Ralph)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 08:48 PM
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UPDATE

Suspected drug dealer has now gone 34 days without taking a poo

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 08:43 PM
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ANYTHING TO DECLARE?

Tourists caught smuggling gold into Japan inside their rectums

(From the Asahi Shimbun! Get it? Ha!)

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 05:49 PM
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IN OUR VIEW, IT DEPENDS ON THE DOG

Bill to prevent minors, or a dog, from becoming Kansas governor moves forward

(Thanks to Kevin Smith)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 05:44 PM
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THEY BOOST ATTENDANCE

China wages war on funeral strippers

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 03:11 PM
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NIGHTS ARE LONG UP THERE

Saskatchewan family adorns farm fence with nearly 100 colourful bicycles

(Thanks to John Lobert)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 01:02 PM
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FLORIDAAAAAAAAAA

Corndog Poke Leads to Criminal Charges

(Thanks to Brian Duval)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 12:51 PM
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THE SCIENCE IS (burp) SETTLED

Drinking alcohol key to living past 90

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 06:09 AM
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AND STAY OFF THEIR LAWN

Women took axe to truck blocking their driveway

Names We Are Not Making Fun Of: Alongkorn Sirisongkhram, Rachanikorn Lertwasana, Ratanachat Saengyoktrakarn and Ranee Saengyoktrakarn.

(Thanks to Phil McAvity)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 06:07 AM
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SEEMS LOGICAL

Farmer believes this massive poster of a porn star in his field has boosted his crops

(Thanks to Le Petomane and Ralph)

Posted by Dave on February 20, 2018 at 06:00 AM
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February 19, 2018

SHE WAS RELEASED AFTER THE PARAKEET PRODUCED A VALID FLORIDA DRIVER'S LICENSE

NASHVILLE, Tenn. -- A woman in her 70s who was allegedly impaired has been arrested after leading police on a short, slow chase and evading arrest while holding a parakeet.

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

Posted by Dave on February 19, 2018 at 02:46 PM
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CURLING UPDATE

Olympic curler’s husband double-fisting his third and fourth beers at 9 a.m. is a legend

(Thanks to Jane Linderman)

Russian curler reportedly fails doping test after winning bronze

(Thanks to Matt Filar and Al Barkafski)

This blog can totally relate.

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Posted by Dave on February 19, 2018 at 02:43 PM
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EW

Police: Woman tries to steal camera, hurls feces in escape

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on February 19, 2018 at 02:39 PM
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